this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2026
534 points (98.9% liked)

196

6811 readers
2214 users here now

Community Rules

You must post before you leave

Be nice. Assume others have good intent (within reason).

Block or ignore posts, comments, and users that irritate you in some way rather than engaging. Report if they are actually breaking community rules.

Use content warnings and/or mark as NSFW when appropriate. Most posts with content warnings likely need to be marked NSFW.

Most 196 posts are memes, shitposts, cute images, or even just recent things that happened, etc. There is no real theme, but try to avoid posts that are very inflammatory, offensive, very low quality, or very "off topic".

Bigotry is not allowed, this includes (but is not limited to): Homophobia, Transphobia, Racism, Sexism, Abelism, Classism, or discrimination based on things like Ethnicity, Nationality, Language, or Religion.

Avoid shilling for corporations, posting advertisements, or promoting exploitation of workers.

Proselytization, support, or defense of authoritarianism is not welcome. This includes but is not limited to: imperialism, nationalism, genocide denial, ethnic or racial supremacy, fascism, Nazism, Marxism-Leninism, Maoism, etc.

Avoid AI generated content.

Avoid misinformation.

Avoid incomprehensible posts.

No threats or personal attacks.

No spam.

Moderator Guidelines

Moderator Guidelines

  • Don’t be mean to users. Be gentle or neutral.
  • Most moderator actions which have a modlog message should include your username.
  • When in doubt about whether or not a user is problematic, send them a DM.
  • Don’t waste time debating/arguing with problematic users.
  • Assume the best, but don’t tolerate sealioning/just asking questions/concern trolling.
  • Ask another mod to take over cases you struggle with, if you get tired, or when things get personal.
  • Ask the other mods for advice when things get complicated.
  • Share everything you do in the mod matrix, both so several mods aren't unknowingly handling the same issues, but also so you can receive feedback on what you intend to do.
  • Don't rush mod actions. If a case doesn't need to be handled right away, consider taking a short break before getting to it. This is to say, cool down and make room for feedback.
  • Don’t perform too much moderation in the comments, except if you want a verdict to be public or to ask people to dial a convo down/stop. Single comment warnings are okay.
  • Send users concise DMs about verdicts about them, such as bans etc, except in cases where it is clear we don’t want them at all, such as obvious transphobes. No need to notify someone they haven’t been banned of course.
  • Explain to a user why their behavior is problematic and how it is distressing others rather than engage with whatever they are saying. Ask them to avoid this in the future and send them packing if they do not comply.
  • First warn users, then temp ban them, then finally perma ban them when they break the rules or act inappropriately. Skip steps if necessary.
  • Use neutral statements like “this statement can be considered transphobic” rather than “you are being transphobic”.
  • No large decisions or actions without community input (polls or meta posts f.ex.).
  • Large internal decisions (such as ousting a mod) might require a vote, needing more than 50% of the votes to pass. Also consider asking the community for feedback.
  • Remember you are a voluntary moderator. You don’t get paid. Take a break when you need one. Perhaps ask another moderator to step in if necessary.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

Alt TextA thread of the posts by @cait.bsky.social. They read as follows:

I had my first talk therapy session with my new therapist and she hit me with the "you're very self-aware" ☹️

not the "pleasure to have in class" of therapy

that's right, I know all the tools and have developed countertools so they no longer work. welcome to thunderdome

Link to post

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 3 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

I'm going to push back but only slightly, as I agree that society itself and this hierarchy we're stuck in is the root of a lot of mental health problems, maybe even the biggest sole contributer.

But where I'll push back is that improving your mental health is different from improving your material situation. Both are important. The latter is about survival and between the two, arguably the far more important one. But the former is about how you react to the latter.

If you're having panic attacks each time you think about your material situation, that's going to make it much harder to deal with that situation. If you have trouble motivating yourself to get out of bed, that probably also affects your ability to do anything about your situation. If you lose your temper to the point where you destroy objects or relationships around you, that doesn't help either.

Or on the perception side, if you're constantly paranoid about everyone around you to the point where you don't let anyone get close, it can help to recalibrate your expectations or where you draw your line for not trusting others.

Or if you recognize a pattern of using or manipulating people and want to break it or figure out why you keep returning to it.

I think in regards to how society is, therapy can teach you acceptance. I don't mean "accept that this is the way it is and that it is fine", you don't have to do that second part. But the first part is true: the world is the way it is and unhealthy reactions won't punish the world or change it, nor will allowing your nervous system to go into overdrive.

Whether you want to change it or just find a place in it, you need to first accept it for what it is, for better or worse. Then when you have that foundation of understanding and healthy coping skills, you have a much better chance of accomplishing, well, anything. Note that that is relative, I'm not going to try to push BS platitudes like "you can do anything!" It's just "if you have a healthy mind or healthy ways of dealing with an unhealthy mind, you'll have a better chance at doing anything compared to if you don't".

Anyways, therapy is one potential path to that. I see therapists as guides for a journey of introspection and getting to know yourself better as well as understand how you interact with the world and find new ways of doing so. Ultimately you are the one that needs to walk that path and the destination is still this reality, just with a healthier way of seeing and interacting with it.

Fixing this shit will involve a lot more than therapy, but it will require healthy minds.

Though I also don't think the "gee thanks I'm cured" mindset is a healthy one. While I agree that it's easier said than done, mental health is heavily influenced by your mindset and deciding "this won't help" can be the reason why it doesn't. Part of getting better, an essential part of it, is deciding that's what you want and fighting the part of you that wants to just keep going like you have been because you're comfortable with your habits, both good and bad.

[–] PeacefulShadows@aussie.zone 3 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

All this is true but just taking the time to validate those externalities would be so helpful. You know, giving their take on how screwed up the forces outside have become on making people's lives difficult. That validation alone would be such a helpful therapy tool. But in my experience it's almost like they barely want to touch it. Why not? It's almost dehumanising not to. What are they so competent or wealthy they don't feel the awful pressures as well? They don't have an opinion as to why the voters around the world, say, are increasingly turning to fascist alternatives for example out of desperation? It almost seems weird.

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 2 points 12 hours ago

Yeah, true. I mean, there's probably some that do, some that are in denial themselves, some that think they are on the winning side, and some that think anything negative will hinder the process. The formal parts of the process itself could have been coopted by the ruling class such that therapists are trained to perpetuate the system like cops and teachers are.