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I grew up poor in a semi remote Native reserve in Canada in the 1970s and 80s. The first ten years of my life my parents were still basically living off the land and most of what we ate was wild food. I didn't even have that many sweets or junk food which saved my teeth when I was young.
Then as a teen, I had to fight and claw my way through life in order to get anything. Sure we got 'free' help for food, health care, dental, eye and education ... but it was just barely enough for me to barely get through high school. At the end of it all, I still had no prospect of making a living on my own in my own home community .. I had to leave in order to survive. Even after then, I had to fight every step of way to make a living and fight off my old community members who thought I was being 'too white' and the non-Native people who thought I wasn't 'white enough' ... it was completely messed up.
After fighting through all that crap into adulthood, I met someone I fell in love with who wanted to do the same things I wanted to do. We didn't make that much money but we figured out how to travel to over 30 countries over 25 years. About six years ago was our last trip because we caught a virus that make us sick and cough our lungs out ... it was terrible. It took me about three months to get over it. My wife never got over it and now sits at home with chronic lung disease. It's left us at home and we can never leave again.
The reason why I am saying all this is is that you have the world by the tail ... you've got everything. You have a job, shelter, a bit of money and you are young and capable.
Give yourself about ten or 20 years and you will feel less and less like doing anything and then it will all be over. Once you get to a certain age, you will feel like 'hey, I think maybe I want to do something' but by then, it will be too little, too late and you won't have a choice and you will be stuck in your apartment or house or home or whereever you'll be and just sit there and wait for death. The entire time you'll be sitting there, you'll be regretting that you never did anything and that you never went out and tried just doing the bare minimum of excitement.
I feel terrible that I can no longer do much and that I have to stay at home taking care of my wife. I love her dearly but I would much rather we both head out into the world and just go somewhere, anywhere as far as money would take us. I really never cared if where I went was warm, dry, hot, cold, wet or miserable or absolutely fantastic. Sometimes, the best part of the trip was coming back home and realizing just how wonderful and fantastic home really was compared to many places in this world.
The only thing that doesn't make us completely miserable and regretful is that we did go out there and take in as many sights, sounds and tastes as we could afford. It was fantastic. We saw the Acropolis hill, the pyramids, Machu pichu, St Peters, the Mediterranean, buddhists temples in asia, indian landmarks, dozens of cheap motel dives in the US and Canada, the oceans on every side of North America and so much more ... all for as little money as we had.
Now that we can't move or go anywhere any more ... we look at old photos and reminisce about every trip we ever took.
Go out there and go as far as you can possibly go ... then when you get old and grey, you can be as sad as you want but at least you can look back on all the great things you saw.
I wish that there was some sort of equivalent of Reddit gold… That is a fantastic comment, with a ton of useful advice. OP cooks his own food, a better way to find new food and things you’ve never come across otherwise, is by traveling. It really does broaden the mind, gives you a better perspective on things,… But Mr. ININ, I hope the best for you. You did some awesome stuff and can’t anymore. I feel your pain.
Op: see the world. Get the shittiest inside cabin you can on a cruise ship that goes to a bunch of different countries. Think of it like a sampler pack of that part of the world. If you see something that strikes you fancy, plan to go back. Plan all the things you want to do or see. Look on some guides online. If you don’t knowwhat to do with the money, you can’t take it with you, go do something with it.
Cruises are an environmental nightmare; we really should not be promoting them for any reason.
Cruise! ... that is one cheap way to visit a bunch of places.
Go sign up to a website called ... wwww.vacationstogo.com .... make a basic account with an email and then look for a link in the website called '30 day ticker' - it's all last minute cruise deals. Last minute cruise deals are not the same as last minute air fare deals. Air fare deals are usually discounted a few days or even a week or two before the flight. Cruises are discounted two months or a month before departure. The vacationstogo website is a general website that lists every deal from every cruise company. You can search through cruises going to anywhere in the world.
We stumbled on this site about ten years ago and we got on about 8 - 9 cruises in the Mediterranean. We basically used it as a glorified ferry to take us from one place to another. If you just leave your schedule open and take whatever is available you can literally cruise for almost nothing. We took several cruises to get from Spain to Italy ... 7 day cruises that cost $400 CAD ... all inclusive! It was cheaper to take the cruise and vacation for 7 days with free room and board than it was to fly to Italy and rent hotels and buy food. We once went with friends for 14 days for about $1,000 all inclusive ... that might sound like a lot but divided across 14 days that $70 a day to see 6/7 cities, all the food you want, no alcohol because we don't drink, don't bother with excursions, just go take a walk yourself, workout gym on the ship, and you get to be in giant hotel right in port in the centre of some of the most beautiful cities in the world.
My recommendation is ... go on the Mediterrean cruises to actually see fantastic cities, food and history ... go Caribbean if all you want to is party and see poor people in third world countries ... go Asian if you want to safely see a bunch of great Asian countries.
This is how we were able to see the pyramids in Giza. We took a random cruise to Turkey and one of the stops was Alexandria and Port Said, both ports that could take you to the Pyramids. We took the cheapest excursions on both just to see these great wonders and it was amazing.
If you're afraid of travelling, go on a cruise. We always joked that we could just grab a cruise from Montreal, New York or Florida, cross the Atlantic on a last minute deal, then just keep taking cheap deals once we arrived on the other side and then grab more cheap deals to head home and never use a plane the entire time.
God yes. Did 1 cruise and literally saw the Sistine Chapel, the Colosseum, Michelangelo’s David, walked around in Pompeii, scaled a volcano, saw where the Olympics started, the Parthenon, amazing art (Birth of Venus just to name another), incredible food, incredible people. Spent months planning it, ton of pics, and now make some “new” dishes all the time.
OP: meds and a therapist. Meds to fix the chemistry, therapist to teach you how to live life happily.