this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2025
358 points (94.1% liked)

Not The Onion

15979 readers
1797 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 58 points 1 month ago (4 children)

They must be saving Hillary for when things get really bad

[–] darkpanda@lemmy.ca 14 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Michael Dukakis is their ace in the hole.

[–] Zorque@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

They're not quite sure if they want to rock us yet.

[–] darkpanda@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 month ago

I know of someone we can send out to offer a Handshake.

[–] untorquer@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

I would joke about Al Gore but he's definitely too far left

[–] foggy@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Is Kitty Dukakis still on drugs?

[–] Vandals_handle@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I hear she's now mainlining a mixture of formaldehyde, glutaraldehyde, and methanol.

Edit: spelling

[–] dvoraqs@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

I mean if Trump were to attempt to run for president again, I'm sure the Dems would put Obama on the ticket with the same reasoning for a third term.

Somebody call Howard Dean. That's the level of enthusiasm we need right now.

[–] Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 0 points 1 month ago

Plan A was Jimmy Carter but alas

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world -1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I mean, I wouldn't mind some Hillary right now.

^~not an endoresement~^

[–] Beetschnapps@lemmy.world -2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

The fuck would you want some sort of that even handed well educated steady hand at the wheel?

Why the fuck would you want that? Compared to now? Cause GeNoCiDe?

^~not an endoresement~^

[–] imsufferableninja@sh.itjust.works 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You forgot to turn off the signature when you switched sock puppet accounts

[–] TrickDacy@lemmy.world -5 points 1 month ago (1 children)