this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2025
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I bet this sounds like a stupid question - especially coming from a man. However, NoStupidQuestions doesn’t allow NSFW topics, so here I am - bear with me.

I genuinely don’t know what this feels like from the inside. I see so many men go to extreme lengths to chase women - sometimes even risking their careers or relationships just to get laid. Some are literally willing to pay for it. I don’t get it. What does that pull actually feel like?

I’m not judging - I’m trying to understand. I only know what it looks like from the outside, but I have no idea what it’s like on the inside. I’ve had sex multiple times, and it’s fine, but it seems vastly overrated to me. Clearly, I’m not getting out of it what most other men are, so I’m trying to understand the baseline experience.

My motivation for asking is that I’m working on myself and hoping that, eventually, I’ll be able to feel even a fraction of that same pull. However, with things like lifting weights, I at least have a clear image in mind of what I’m working toward - but it’s harder to define that when it comes to subjective experiences.

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[–] Wildmimic@anarchist.nexus 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

For me, it feels urgent, like when i've not eaten the whole day and my blood sugar hits the point where you start shaking. And when i'm in a sexual situation, i feel approved, closeness, intimacy; there's nothing in the world that makes me feel loved and accepted as much as physical contact with someone i allow coming close to me. Hmm, might explain why i absolutely hate touchy people, the ones who touch your shoulder when talking to you are awful.

[–] Hadriscus@jlai.lu 2 points 1 day ago

Yea, there's something extremely fulfilling about intimacy, beyond the satiating effect of the act itself. Your choice of words here (approved, closeness...) definitely rings a bell