this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2025
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I picked world bc I was told it would have the most activity. Since joining Lemmy I have been repeatedly harassed by men on this instance, threatened with murder and rape by users including open Nazis (this was also happening on Reddit), and permabanned for being a woman, for being a feminist, and for not breaking any rules and posting factual news sources. Would like a better instance.

Have been considering solarpunk Lemmy but willing to consider other instances, just not sure

Eta: I'm looking for a recommendation of an instance, not your personal opinion on my experiences or feelings. If you are not going to give me the name of an instance you'd recommend, don't comment.

Here’s an article on tone policing: https://www.housing.wisc.edu/2023/12/inclusive-language-series-tone-policing-2/

• You need to recognize the indicators of tone policing, such as telling someone to calm down or to lower their tone for their message to be better received.

• Understand that various levels of emotions will often be expressed, especially during political or hot topic conversations.

• To refrain from invalidating other people’s feelings, try self-reflecting on your desire to invalidate their emotions and think about if this is due to your own discomfort.

• Tone policing must stop, especially when engaging in conversations regarding experiences with discrimination, oppression, and racism.

Here’s an article on hysteria: https://www.bps.org.uk/psychologist/hysteria-historical-mirror-misogyny-medicine

During the early 20th century, women were thought to be unfit for politics as their biology made them prone to hysteria. The suffrage movement became linked to hysteria and mental disorder, due to propaganda from the press and the government (Iglikowski-Broad, 2018). Attempts at militancy in their pursuit for equality were branded as hysteria by anti-suffrage supporters, demonstrating how use of mental health could be used to belittle the efforts of the women at the time (Thompson, 2016).

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[–] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 63 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (4 children)

OK so decided to check the modlog. You've been banned from 5 different comms on 4 different instances by 5 different mods.

  • One for name calling and personal attacks.
  • One for trolling.
  • One for being generally unpleasant.
  • One says many many rule violations.
  • One says Repeated misinformation.

On comms like casual UK and tumblr.

You have two removed posts, one posting us news where it isnt allowed. One being 'not news', which is arguable.

And so many removed comments that I can't even go through it all. Having read a couple they seem fair. I'm sure theres some unfair ones amongst them.

But your behaviour is very reddit like. Please understand that this place is run by the money and effort of the individuals who you are often attacking, the admins. People here also prefer to be chill and not combative unless there's extreme right wingers. Mild petty internet disagreements are not worth being uncivil about.

You are of course more than welcome here as your heart is clearly in the right place but please understand that people here just want a chill space to be in.

Edit: and this is one of 5 accounts!

[–] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 30 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"Lol you aren't evil, you are just weak minded and unable to perform empathy at an adult level. Asking you to do so created a tantrum. Yes, you are a gender narcissist as I've explained. You are sexist, quite transparently. I won't go away, I have a right to exist here. You can leave if you want, since you have nothing substantial to add. I'd also bite your dick off to watch you writhe so you might want to keep the sweety comment to yourself. I'm not that sweet, professionally so."

I'm not even looking for bad ones, this is just right upfront. The whole conversation is a mess, not just you.

But both sets of comments were removed not just yours.

[–] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 24 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"He does. One is an executive of neuralink. Elon and other billionaires literally want to kill everyone and start their own super human race. They are starting a civil war."

I despise elon but wouldn't complain if this was removed for being misinformation.

[–] Gorilladrums@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Damn, she got exposed lmao. You're doing the lord's work be sharing this with the community, thank you.

Wasn't my goal honestly. 🤷‍♂️

[–] LustyArgonianMana@lemmy.world -4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Exposed for things I openly talked about in my first comment? Doing the lord's work for not putting the comments I was responding to? Enlightened centrism supporting the status quo of the patriarchy once again, and women better shut up and get in line, huh?