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Mind i ask what are you trying to archive? At what point would you see yourself as a programmer? When its in your job description? X amount of projects worked on on GitHub?
As an auti-dd I really really like coding and i had a developer job once to discover i absolutely loathed it. I hated having rules and infrastructure that directed me how to code, i hated being told what i could work on. I could not stand having a schedule telling me when to code and from what desk to do it.
The only thing that makes me want to code is to creatively express myself. I no longer accept compromise beyond creative limitations i myself put in place. (Really autistic-pedantic shit sometimes)
My current job description is an IT position that could not be further removed from coding in its description. It also doesn’t challenge me. I don't want it too because now i often have spare free to “improve the functioning of the workplace” which i do by writing scripts and tools that fix common annoyances in our legacy software and save my coworkers plenty of time.
Or in house developer team (who have no time and are to distant from other day-to-day work have expressed confusion why someone like me wants to stay in my role rather then join them but i know i wont be able to continue my side projects and am just going to get assigned to expensive-big-ego-pet-project instead.
I also have plenty of code related projects at home, i lost motivation for those when i was a “real programmer”
Sorry but what's an auti-dd? I guess you mean autistic but what's dd?
Autism+Add which is adhd minus the external hyperactivity.
There is alot of overlap between these and others also so i usually prefer the term neurodivergent.