this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2025
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Mental Health

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How the fuck do I actually find a decent DBT therapist?? (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by dingus@lemmy.world to c/mentalhealth@lemmy.world
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I've been through idk how many therapists. And therapy is expensive as fuck because my insurance is shit. So I'm fucking done with this bullshit.

Most therapists I've tried, even if they claim to have certain treatment modalities, seem to just be keen on sitting there and listening to me talk without giving me much guidance at all. They give me vague ideas and not actually real skills or homework. This isn't helping me at all whatsoever.

Part of the issue is that I literally could never pinpoint what the fuck my issue was. I did see a therapist years back who seemed to actually give skills and worksheets, but she was using CBT for a minor issue for me because I couldn't figure out what my problem actually was. I only had a few sessions and then stopped due to the price and the fact that I thought she latched onto a minor problem to treat (and I didn't know my issue then).

When someone told me about "emotional dysregulation" and I found out that DBT is the gold standard for it, I have tried to find some who practice this, but it seems that most don't. And those who claim to are actually often essentially talk therapists who just listen to me instead of giving me techniques and homework to build skills.

I'm frustrated as all fucking hell. Recently my work told me I will be fired if I cannot sort myself out. I am desperate here.

I live in the US, Florida specifically.

Thanks for listening.

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[–] the_q@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 day ago (4 children)

https://a.co/d/9bqM6Pw get this in the meantime and work through it even of your anger tells you it's stupid.

[–] dingus@lemmy.world 1 points 1 hour ago

Update 2: The therapist I grilled today actually showed me the generic version of this book (not the anxiety one) unprompted so I think that's a good sign. She said she works with the book with you.

[–] dingus@lemmy.world 1 points 2 hours ago

Update...I sat down with it last night and it started ok but then I got triggered really badly and had to stop because I was really distressed lol.

I have access to hydroxyzine (which I honestly don't use...it's like Benadryl and was given to me in case I ever need trouble sleeping which I don't). Don't laugh but I was consulting chatgpt and it gave me the idea to try taking it before I do any of these DBT workbooks and stuff to help me relax. Gonna give it a shot and see what happens!

[–] dingus@lemmy.world 1 points 16 hours ago

Thanks for the rec!!! You know I bought this book a while ago (but the generic one, not one specifically for anxiety...I didn't realize they had different subsets) and never really cracked it open.

Well I pulled it out and ran over to FedEx to print out all the online worksheets lol. Gonna start checking it out tonight.

Have you used this yourself?

[–] standarduser@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 21 hours ago

I can second this recommendation if it is possible to be found outside of Amazon and at a local book shop.