this post was submitted on 16 Dec 2025
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Everybody watch out, we got a badass over here.
They're not wrong, though. Even their Diablo sauce is only rated to around ~15,000 SHU (though some will argue that Fire sauce is hotter and thus Diablo is actually less than 1000, myself included).
Even if the rating is accurate, that means at the very most Taco Bell sauce is barely hotter than a jalapeño, which any hot sauce enthusiast will confirm is on the lower end of the Scoville scale.
The point I'm making is that they're not bragging, they're stating simple facts.
I just believe words have meaning
If Taco Bell has sauces that are Hot, Fire, and Diablo then what are other actual hot sauces called?
It's hyperbole, like someone saying their chicken wings were AMAZING.
If by some miracle Jesus came down from heaven and made sweet love to you all night what would you call it? They've already wasted AMAZING on a damn chicken wing.
credit to Louis CK for the Jesus bit
Hot sauce has a long history of hyperbole with marketing. I get that a lot of folks have a preference for high spice (I am one) and the pinch of cayenne that goes into a fancy fruit pie or taco bell sauce packet is going to be barely detectable, but I cook a lot for other folks and if someone says they don't like any spice then diablo will ruin their night.
I think those names are pretty appropriate on the scale of Mild to Ass Reaper.
I'd call that shit biblical, messianic. Miraculous, even.
I probably wouldn't enjoy it though because I don't like men that way.
I have faith that Jesus would become a woman for me.
Unfortunately in religion, PR comes before everything. Or before most things. And Jesus's clients know him as a man, so I don't think he's gonna budge on that
I'd call it what it is: rape.
Supreme Court already said Jesus also has presidential immunity