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What to do with 4yo when we put down the cat? (fedia.io)

submitted 3 weeks ago by Maestro@fedia.io to c/parenting@lemmy.world

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I have a 14 year old Maine Coon that is terminally ill and has a few weeks at best. Our son recently turned 4 years old and loves animals. We taught him to be kind to all animals, even bugs. He is not particularly attached to the cat, but he likes it well enough (the cat is not a cuddler).

In a few weeks we'll have to go to the vet and have the cat put down. We're wondering how we should approach this with our son. Do we take him with us? Do we let him be present when the cat is put to sleep? Or make him stay in the waiting area? Or do we go when he's in school? What's appropriate for a 4 year old?

On the one hand I think that death is a part of life. And I don't mind that he sees us crying over the cat. But I also don't want to traumatize him or make it bigger than it is.

Any tips?

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[–] tyler@programming.dev 1 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah I’m sorry but I already have animals at that point. Our dog has an illness with a 10-20% survival chance in surgery. We’re still deciding on surgery, because the rates have increased in the past few years due to people putting their dogs through surgery. She also has a severely damaged tendon that we went through one surgery on. This dog is the happiest in the world, it doesn’t matter if she’s going to live a shorter life if we don’t get surgery, do you honestly think that she would want to be killed for it?

Think about it this way. If you had an infected hip with a 0% survival rate would you want your family to say you should be put down because of it? Or would you want to spend your time doing fun stuff or maybe going through the surgery to help out science? Dying for no reason is the worst option here. Medically assisted suicide isn’t what we’re talking about here, we’re talking about being killed without a choice in the matter.

For someone claiming others are throwing out strawmen you sure are good at them.

Please allow a world that is just uncaring to all living beings - and some of us are confronted with that more than you apparently are. And no, I'm no longer talking about animals.

I have no clue what this sentence means.

For context here though: I have a chronic condition, my mom died young from a chronic condition. My dog has two chronic conditions, both of my cats have chronic conditions, and my wife has a chronic condition. You are the one bringing suffering into this world by killing dogs that someone else would take care of until their natural death. You are removing happiness from this world and if you think for a second that your dog wants to be put down because of a hip then you do not understand dogs.

I’m willing to bet you crate your animals and I bet you think breed is an indicator of violence too.

I’m done with this conversation.