this post was submitted on 26 Apr 2026
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One of my children is questioning their gender, and they seem at ease with non-binary. I found this out yesterday, so I'm approaching this gently, though I feel ill-prepared. I want to be who they need.

I'm curious about the experiences of other parents, or stories about your parents learning to adjust if you came out to them.

Follow-up: Thank you all so much for your stories and your feedback!

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[–] GrayBackgroundMusic@lemmy.zip 3 points 21 hours ago

I never would have come out to my parents. They would not have handled it well. Our kids have come out to us, and we've reassured them that it doesn't matter. We had kids to love them and raise awesome adults, no matter what.

My advice is to tell them that this takes time for you to adjust. Old habits are hard to break. One kid has been on HRT for over a year and eeeeeeeevery once in a while I'll call them their birth gender. Kids don't understand that we view them as a sum of all their life. They only view themselves in that instant. No matter that my trans kid is Gender A now, I still have sooooo many memories and pictures of them as Gender B, and I love that part of them, still. I love both periods of my kiddo's life.