as a man in america, you don't seem to understand that it's their only option. it's the only method of emotional expression that is considered normative and acceptable for a dude to ever show to others publically.

american society, does not allow men to have any other emotion than anger. any despair of any other emotion, is socially shamed and condemned.

i am not allowed to be happy, or be sad, to anything other, than ANGRY or STOIC. these are things people are like 'oh you are angry! good!' 'oh you are stoic about everything else! good!' this is THE NORMAL WAY people expect men to be. all other expressions are not allowed, other than maybe the most extreme circumstances. when can you cry as a man? the birth of your child, maybe, a funeral for your parent/child/spouse, maybe.

you can blame men all you want, but as a man, i can't even say I love my dog without them looking at me like I'm insane or weird or mentally ill. because I'm not allowed to express anything other than anger. if I'm anger, that's normal and OK, anything else? something is WRONG with me. if I am angry with my dog, oh, that's normal, that's good! you should be mad and correct your dog! if I am sad or disappointed my dog did something bad? people become weird and hostile.

my cat died a few months ago. i was really sad about it. other than my sister, nobody was comfortable with this. my friends, my girlfriend at the time, would just be like 'oh that sucks' and look at me like i was disturbed, because I was... legitimately sad and grieving. But it's... NOT ALLOWED to show these emotions in public for men. If I was a lady, you can be bit people would be touching my arm and empathetic and hugging me.

Like, seriously, what do you want these men to do, when their entire life they have been told any display of emotion is just results in further social estrangement? Oh, right, just go to therapy, get 'fixed' don't bother to change anything about the society they live in, just fix their shit privately at very high financial cost to themselves, and keep trucking on as before. but don't ever express joy, don't ever cry, don't ever be happy or sad or anything other than angry, because there is 'something wrong' with you if you dare to express yourself like 'a woman'.

oh and what is the 'stock reply' to my comment, 99% i bring this comment up? 'oh well that's just you and you need therapy, or you need better friends/family/girlfriends and it's your fault you picked bad ones'. lol, OK right, yeah, it's always each individual man's fault... and never the way they are collectively treated by other people their entire lives once they hit puberty, when they are basically forced by everyone around them to never ever express anything because it is 'unmanly' or 'weird', or it's considered feminine/homosexual.

probably why i was a theater kid. only place i could every display emotional publically, even if they were fake. I could at least use the art of acting as a means of emotional expression, as long as it's pretend! sadly, not every young person gets such a positive outlet for their emotions.

and as you age, that net of what is socially expressible for a man gets tighter and tighter and tighter. which is why so many older guys start losing it or fall into depression, because nothing is more pathetic or contemptible for people than a guy who is 30-55 expressing emotions, let alone, emotional complexity. literally the only emotion older men are allowed to express without social rejection, is anger, so that's all they do express.