Ask Lemmy
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You sure you're not neurodivergent? This is a very neurodivergent train of thought ngl.
Social anxiety is not neurodivergent. It's more unusual to NOT think about how you are perceived. Asking the internet because you don't trust people to be honest with you, though...
Why asking the internet part is bad? With anonymity it's oddly one of the safest places. Rather good risk to reward ratio.
If identifying details are avoided, it can't really come back to haunt me in the real world, which does matter a little more and if someone starts to stalk me then i can block them or just purge the user and make a new one.
At the same time it's completely possible to get some feedback. Kinda like gauging how people would react and refining the trail of taught before releasing it to real world.
Over the years, this sort of testing out has been rather useful in clearing my own garbled up mind. Maybe kinda like interactive journaling. If the trail of taught or thinking patterns get too negative, it generally gets pointed out and i can reassess those.
Me being whatever I am does not change the validity of the question. Many presumably neurotypical people could really do with some honest mirror of how they come across. Yet the presumably on-average-neurotypical peers don't say anything out of politeness or other reasons.
And I ask here for the same reason I don't ask IRL friends: we are all anonymous strangers here, nobody knows me enough to not tell me my idea is stupid, and I don't know anyone enough to be offended by being told it is stupid.