this post was submitted on 11 Jun 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] ryedaft@sh.itjust.works 37 points 2 months ago (3 children)
[–] But_my_mom_says_im_cool@lemmy.world 30 points 2 months ago (3 children)

Sure, Viking love looks appealing, until your husband starts bringing home sex slaves and teaching your children how to raid England.

[–] UnrepententProcrastinator@lemmy.ca 16 points 2 months ago

The being taught to raid England part seems lit.

[–] Acinonyx@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

since I'd be the husband in this scenario, I don't see what's wrong with it

[–] LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 12 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Also, I think I would be an equal-opportunity viking raider. My wife would get some English sex slaves of her own for our anniversary.

[–] Natanael@infosec.pub 6 points 2 months ago

It wasn't even unusual with female vikings.

[–] nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 months ago

god i love sex

[–] Klear@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Take her raiding! Make her your viqueen.

[–] Acinonyx@lemmy.sdf.org -2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)

if you're doing this you're just cucking yourself

[–] LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (2 children)
  1. And?
  2. If you're not torturing English villagers together with your wife during the winter, is it even a viking marriage?
[–] FarmTaco@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

you know what they say; the couple who pillages together, stays together.

[–] Acinonyx@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 2 months ago

I've never said anything against torturing english villagers

[–] Vanilla_PuddinFudge@infosec.pub 3 points 2 months ago

It's an open relationship, fundie.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

MFW people keep trying to romanticize the Viking lifestyle

Our culture is not a costume.

I need more of this show

[–] ssfckdt@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

They're the same picture.

[–] lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Ah, I see, Anon wishes he gets cuddles and intamacy in a heteroromantic way.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

No no. It's the perfectly round unblemished skin and hair that's so full-bodied it practically defies gravity.