Emperor Winn in the back of the class:
Risa
Star Trek memes and shitposts
Come on'n get your jamaharon on! There are no real rules—just don't break the weather control network.
Keiko would show them Machete order (4,5,2,3,6) for sure. No need to talk about a background character with a few lines.
So uh what's the rationale behind Machete order? Keep you in suspense?
And 1?
What's that?
Machete order says you should skip 1 because it's bad and allegedly doesn't add anything to the story, particularly if you're looking at 2 and 3 as providing more context around Luke's story in the OT.
But then you miss Qui-Gon and Darth Maul!
I've spent most of the ~45 minutes since writing that last comment reading the machete order creator's update post and the comments underneath it. And I just really wanted to highlight one particularly excellent comment from a user going by "amusingmurff".
I didn't know the "right" way was to skip TPM, and while I find a lot of your points valid for skipping it, I find it to be helpful to demonstrate how the Jedi Order failed. There are references to the Jedi prohibition against strong emotion in II and III, but it is in terms of how Anakin is failing to be a "proper" Jedi by his inability to let go of his emotions and attachments. Ep I shows that perhaps it is the Jedi Council, who only say "don't feel anything, that way leads to the Dark Side!" that are mistaken. Is Anakin's inability to let go of emotion/attachment at the core of his Fall? Yeah. But Luke succeeds in VI because he also fails to let go of attachment and sentiment - Vader is only redeemed and defeats Palapatine because Luke can't let go of the affection he has for a family tie and the idea that his father still has some good. [...] I find it a more compelling story if you see that it's not really a tale of the beleaguered good guys (Jedi) who are outwitted by the evil, all powerful Emperor, but that they contributed to their own downfall and doomed the rest of the galaxy. That way, the OT heroes have to not only do away with the Empire, but probably do away with a lot of the forms of the old order, including the Jedi Code as it was
There's some other good discussion in those comments, including a reply to that one, and I definitely recommend reading through it if this line of discussion is interesting to you.
From the perspective of someone just wanting an awesome time, I agree completely. Or from the perspective of a Star Wars fan who wants all the lore and extended material. And personally, I would never want to skip it, myself.
But the goal of the Machete cut is to take a look at the Original Trilogy and ask: how can we get the best narrative experience out of this? It's ultimately about telling Luke Skywalker's story, and providing context to enhance the experience of his narrative. You put 2 and 3 after 4 and 5 to avoid spoiling the reveal at the end of Empire. You use the extended 2-movie flashback as a way to explain who that ghost that appears at the end of 6 is, as well as to enhance the parallels between Luke's and Anakin's characters; namely Luke's use of force choke on Jabba's guards, and him telling Jabba "you underestimate my power"—the same line Anakin uses on Obi Wan in Revenge.
Essentially, we see Anakin's story as a way to provide further context to Luke's. Phantom doesn't aid this at all. Neither Qui-Gon nor Maul appear in any later core film. Phantom only provides further context to Anakin's story, without aiding in Luke's. In the words of the Machete order's original creator:
Some people claim that Episode I isn’t that bad, and shouldn’t be removed (again, it’s not that it’s bad, it’s that it’s not relevant to Luke’s journey in the way that Episode II and III are). Lots of people like the pod race or Darth Maul or Qui-Gon or they were born in 1992. Whatever your reason, if you want to watch Episode I I’d recommend doing so separately, sort of like an “Anthology” film. After all, Machete Order doesn’t interfere with canon, everything is canonically compatible with Episode I (or any later ones) because we’re not watching fan edits.
The original creation came along with a lengthy essay explaining why, pointing to some possible disadvantages, and addressing those. It then briefly went over their experience trying it with someone new to the franchise. Even if, like me, you actually ultimately disagree with the idea of Machete order, it is well worth the read, because the logic behind it is very well put together. Here's a link.
(Incidentally, I always thought the name machete order came from how you're chopping up the timeline. In fact, it's because the former name of the author's blog was "Absolutely No Machete Juggling".)
And pod racing!
I can go watch Mario cart for that.
Mario kart doesn’t have Jar Jar sticking his tongue into an electron beam.
No need to talk about a background character with a few lines.
Uhh, Jar Jar has a pretty key role in Episode 3…
But then we can't see anyone cast summon greater fish! Best part of the trilogy
Responding to your deleted comment, I'm genuinely not sure how Jar Jar's role in the downfall of the Republic in Episode 3 is the joke being made by this comment. Sorry.
Why respond to deleted comments? I deleted it less than 30 seconds after making it.
Because my app shows it to me and I wanted to understand.
"He killed them. He killed them all. They died, every single one of them. And not just the men, but the women and the children, too. He thought of them like animals, and he slaughtered them like animals. He hated them!"
... and now for our next lesson children, the political history and we're starting off with a well known celebrated politician
It's call en media res and it's classic
Sure, but The Odyssey doesn't have Odysseus awkwardly stepping around Scylla's tail in bad CG.
CG was still very primitive in bronze age Greece.
Very few stories begin at the beginning of time.
Even fewer have to retcon the romantic tension of the first episode because that was all they wrote or thought out.
Even the movie being en media res is a retcon.
A New Hope was not called “Episode 4” until its re-release in 1981. Before then it was released and packaged as a stand alone story.
At least she's just telling them about The Emperor and Darth Vader. Not some genuinely terrifying people like Delores Umbridge, or Kai Winn