this post was submitted on 14 Oct 2025
719 points (97.7% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

35125 readers
3101 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca 16 points 3 days ago (1 children)

A skilled vet could still save this pig!

[–] Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 76 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (19 children)

This is not a full English due to the following issues or errors:

  • Fried eggs are ideal, poached acceptable, and some oddballs like scrambled. Boiled egg is not acceptable. There should be two eggs as standard, more if the breakfast is a 'large'.
  • It's missing baked beans, which should have been simmered until the sauce thickens into a syrup.
  • While cafes love to serve this kind of tomato that's only because it's easy to keep a pot of chopped, tinned tomatoes warm. If you're going tinned, they should be good quality whole plum tomatoes. But well-grilled fresh tomatoes are preferable. No cherries. No vine attached. Definitely no raw tomato.
  • It's missing the black pudding which elevates the humble fry-up into the glory that is a proper full English.
  • Experienced afficionados of the full English almost all prefer cooked sausages over raw ones.
  • The mushrooms look like they came in a tin. Ideally whole field or chestnut mushrooms shoud be used.
  • There seems to be a lack of hot buttered toast (with optional marmelade).

There is hearty debate amongst the governing body of the full English about whether or not hash browns are acceptable on a breakfast. Many declare them to be unwanted compared to, for example, bubble and squeak or a tattie scone, or even fried potatoes, or a fried slice for that matter. They go further and label them 'trash browns', 'American nonsense', or just 'shite'. Personally I don't mind them, and consider them to be an optional addition, but not a core requirement of the full English. There are many other optional additions, not to mention regional specialities which render an Ulster fry very different to a full Welsh or a full Scottish. Hogs pudding, white pudding, fruit pudding, haggis, Lorne sausage, potato farl, soda bread, laverbread, kidneys, etc.

There is also a hugely spirited disagreement over the serving of baked beans. There are, by-and-large, three schools of thought with regards the beans (not counting those poor,deluded fools who don't like them). Firstly there's the 'put the beans in a pot' faction who are scared of bean juice contaminating other ingredients. Secondly there are those who eschew the ramekin, considering them to be one of the ultimate signs of pretention. They insist that the beans should be on the plate, but segregated from the other ingredients by a barrier of sausages. Lastly, there is the sane and balanced group who believe that the beans should be put on the plate with no barrier, ideally in the middle. This group of illuminated Full Monty enjoyers recognise that the mixing of bean juice, tomato juice, and egg yolk forms the most perfect gravy of the gods. I, myself, am in the latter camp.

I am available for for keynote speeches on the subject should anyone be organising a full English conference.

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 21 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Love that you took the time to write this out as a comment on a shitpost. That’s dedication!

[–] Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 21 points 4 days ago

Some things matter!

[–] Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 10 points 4 days ago (2 children)

I think that a full english isn't an exclusionary meal. I think there are a few factors it needs to be in the category of full english but that there are many variations and additions or subtractions that still count.

In my opinion the only things required for a full english are any 4 of the following:

  • fried eggs
  • sausages
  • bacon
  • beans
  • toast

Anything less is not "full" and anything more is a variation of the full english.

Hash browns? Sure! ulsterfry? Go for it! Mushrooms? Absolutely! Tomatoes (grilled of course) yes please! Black pudding (not for me) bring it on!

But there is no singular thing that makes it a full english, it just has to have enough of the core ingredients to meet the criteria.

[–] Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 9 points 4 days ago (1 children)

What you describe is a mere fry-up. The required ingredients of a full English are eggs, bacon, sausage, black pudding, beans, and tomato. Six perfect ingredients.

There’s nothing wrong with a fry-up, mind you. But it’s not a full English without the six.

[–] Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 7 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Historically there is no set version of a full english. What you describe is just your version. It will be, entirely, a social construct. This is why the full english varies so much, its different traditions in different areas and families being passed down, giving everyone a different vision of what it is.

Its similar to how everyone has their own christmas traditions, or how fish and chips in the north tend to be more traditionally served with gravy mushy peas and bread+butter. Whereas in the south, typically, they are sold with just ketchup or mayonnaise. But again, not exclusively. They only requirement is a fash and some chips. Everything else is just a variation of that but still counts.

This is why i belive that there only needs to be a few core ingredients for a full english to qualify as a full english. After that its all tradition and preference.

[–] Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Well, you're very welcome to continue enjoying your fry-ups.

[–] Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago

And you are very welcome to enjoy your specific version of a full english. 😀

[–] Jimmycrackcrack@lemmy.ml 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I tend to agree on that more flexible definition with a few core ingredients as baseline but it does seem to me that that core list needs to include at least one regional speciality item specific to the British Isles because I think that's what the "full" part is really referring to as opposed to just a "fry up" as the other bloke suggested. I think in general in England that's probably black pudding.

This thinking is because that minimum combination you listed is fairly common in a few places including Australia and while I don't speak from experience, I think with the exception of the beans if wouldn't be a totally strange or foreign combination in America either.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (17 replies)
[–] AeonFelis@lemmy.world 29 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Don't be ridiculous. Where would they get sunlight in England?

[–] ikidd@lemmy.world 18 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

They'd steal it from the Irish and the Scots, just like everything else.

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 13 points 4 days ago (1 children)

We already did. That’s why they’re both permanently shrouded in cloud.

[–] FosterMolasses@leminal.space 4 points 3 days ago

Savagest comment thread

[–] pewpew@feddit.it 2 points 2 days ago

They don't have sunlight in England

[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world 81 points 5 days ago (12 children)

The utter lack of seasoning make me think this is authentic.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 60 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (2 children)

Heat is classified as a seasoning now.

[–] Bubbaonthebeach@lemmy.ca 19 points 5 days ago

Didn't use enough of that either. Only the bacon looks like it has seen a grill or pan.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Zoomboingding@lemmy.world 9 points 4 days ago (1 children)

The seasoning is the bacon grease this all cooks in. Besides salt and pepper for the egg, that's generally all this needs.

[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 3 days ago (3 children)

a worrying amount of people seem to only consider habanero peppers as flavourful, anything else is unseasoned

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 2 points 3 days ago

Haha, yes. See this all the time online. Like even the idea of just having a nice rare ribeye without a tonne of A1 sauce on it is anathema to them.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (10 replies)
[–] UsedLinuxDealer@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Use of the word "brekky" should be punishable by transport to Australia

[–] JackFrostNCola@aussie.zone 3 points 3 days ago

Im not sure if thats because the grammar or because Aussies actually call it brekky...

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 2 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

That would have been a lot easier than cheaper for me.

[–] rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works 16 points 4 days ago

Sausages are still oinking a little

[–] assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world 9 points 3 days ago

Cooked via suggestion

[–] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 60 points 5 days ago (1 children)
[–] NoForwadSlashS@piefed.social 37 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Come on, that's a Full English Breakfast, not a Roast.

[–] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 37 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago)

DONT RUIN MY DOUBLE ENTENDRE WITH YOUR TRUTHS AND FACTS

[–] AbidingOhmsLaw@lemmy.ml 55 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (2 children)

I'm not English but I thought there should be toast and beans. The sausage looks anemic.

[–] spongebue@lemmy.world 29 points 5 days ago (2 children)

Also not British... Boiled egg? 🤔

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] RalphFurley@lemmy.world 14 points 4 days ago

The hog penises definitely were cooked with sunlight.

[–] stefenauris@pawb.social 33 points 5 days ago (2 children)

nah probably cooked with a hair dryer

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 13 points 5 days ago (2 children)

They placed it under the car with the engine running for five minutes

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)

Brekkele is hessian German for vomiting

[–] ParadoxSeahorse@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago

What pillock has turned a tin of chopped tomatoes on

[–] then_three_more@lemmy.world 22 points 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) (1 children)

No one talking about a Fucking boiled egg?

[–] BeardedGingerWonder@feddit.uk 13 points 5 days ago

That alone indicates the trolling nature of the post.

[–] umbraroze@slrpnk.net 17 points 5 days ago (4 children)

I see no problems with cooking meals with sunlight. (...as we say here in the solarpunk instance)

However, I do see the practical limitations what comes to attempting to cook meals with sunlight in the UK. I have heard the weather is often not favourable.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] PhobosAnomaly@feddit.uk 20 points 5 days ago

Chuck it in the oven for ten minutes, no drama at all.

Then pre-book the following day off work with a dodgy stomach.

load more comments
view more: next ›