this post was submitted on 24 Dec 2023
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Today I Learned

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[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 134 points 11 months ago (6 children)

Monks did most of the writing and artwork.

Monks main diet was brassicas.

They grew their own food.

Do the math, it's wish fulfillment

[–] Eheran@lemmy.world 47 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Brassica, it is ALWAY brassica.

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 13 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Mate, when a full monastery is blowing the covers off every night to the sound of foghorns i care little for correct plurality

[–] agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works 27 points 11 months ago (4 children)

I read their response not as "The correct plural is brassica", but as "Friggin' everything is a brassica cultivar".

If you didn't know: cabbage, kale, broccoli, kohlrabi, brussels sprouts, collard greens and cauliflower are all selectively bred cultivars of the same species.

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[–] JungleJim@sh.itjust.works 21 points 11 months ago

I think you're really on to something here, if you don't work in history or something, you should run this by a historian or scholar and see what they think

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 16 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] Got_Bent@lemmy.world 18 points 11 months ago

Monty Python makes so much more sense now

[–] weariedfae@lemmy.world 12 points 11 months ago

This makes so much sense, is there any evidence? I don't want to spread the rumor as a fun fact unless there's something behind it. Very fun idea!

[–] Starglasses@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 points 11 months ago

Hey, that's clever. Snails are a scourge of gardening. "I want to kill those suckers."

It makes sense that they made doodles of their desirrd victory over the garden-munching snails.

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[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 83 points 11 months ago (5 children)

The exact same thing will happen hundreds of years from now with amogus memes and ~~:.|:;~~

[–] Aussiemandeus@lemmy.world 13 points 11 months ago (3 children)
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[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 72 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I saw this years ago and I still think it was primitive office humor. Snails ate delicious plants and there were probably monks waging a war against them. The incredulity of fighting so hard against an enemy so weak was funny.

[–] butterflyattack@lemmy.world 18 points 11 months ago

This seems like a plausible explanation, but I'd maybe expect to see a few giant slugs and caterpillars - these are at least as damaging to crops as snails.

[–] postmateDumbass@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago

Im betting they got all done up in their armor and went to fight in muddy battlefields, and when they were not fighting the enemy they were dealing with snails crawling inside the armor and being all slimy and disgusting crawling between the knights legs and the armor.

[–] gibmiser@lemmy.world 64 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] NounsAndWords@lemmy.world 62 points 11 months ago (4 children)
[–] kboy101222@sh.itjust.works 13 points 11 months ago

First boss of Shadow of the Erdtree

[–] gibmiser@lemmy.world 12 points 11 months ago

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

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[–] open_world@lemmy.world 54 points 11 months ago (1 children)

The Snail Wars lore has been lost to time

[–] kogasa@programming.dev 17 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Our DNA never forgets. That's why to this day, every human has an innate and irrepressible fear of snails. It's true.

[–] bouh@lemmy.world 17 points 11 months ago (5 children)

Well, in France people eat them... It could still be related though...

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[–] CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social 10 points 11 months ago

Honestly I like snails, they look kinda cute. I get excited whenever I happen to find one

[–] athos77@kbin.social 41 points 11 months ago (7 children)

A few hundred years from now, historians are going to be equally confused by the horse-sized duck images ...

[–] Zorque@kbin.social 20 points 11 months ago (1 children)

And why there are so many pictures of bananas next to things.

[–] athos77@kbin.social 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

"We hypothesize that the bananas of the 21st century were a different type, one that grew in a wider range of climates. We're not certain why this breed seem to have randomly fallen from the trees so often, but perhaps it helps explain all these other drawings of inattentive humans slipping on random banana peels as well. ... "

[–] Drivebyhaiku@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago (5 children)

... Actually the lore behind banana peel gags is more interesting than you think. They were a super cheap snack in Victorian London and the bananas they had were the gros Michel cultivar which had really thick slippery peels and a lack of general cuture of actually throwing garbage in the bin meant that a lot of them rotted on the street so early comedy stage acts started using them as a gag because slipping on them was a common sometimes life threatening hazard.

But because art borrows from art the banana peel gag outlasted the cultural problem that sparked it by over a century.

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[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago

There was this thing going around my work where people would caption a nuke explosion with a mention of a certain guy using the microwave again. There was an incident with a break room microwave. Now imagine if that survives and a thousand years passes.

We believe the one called Gary was a deity of all things nuclear to these people.

[–] bouh@lemmy.world 8 points 11 months ago (2 children)

What about the cat pictures? Will they think they're our gods?

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[–] EtherWhack@lemmy.world 36 points 11 months ago

Not friends of the gentle racing snails? How sad...

[–] greenmarty@lemmy.world 31 points 11 months ago

Imagine future civilization digging out some of today's memes...

[–] SnipingNinja@slrpnk.net 30 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Well, do you see any giant snails around? No? Then thank those knights

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[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 28 points 11 months ago

Ye olde memes.

[–] SlothMama@lemmy.world 27 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Honestly, it would be amazing if the answer was that large mollusks actually existed and were poorly documented.

[–] spongebue@lemmy.world 12 points 11 months ago (2 children)

And just like... Disintegrated instead of fossilizing

[–] BleatingZombie@lemmy.world 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I'm not an expert by ANY means, but I think there needs to be strict conditions to make fossils. I think most bones just eventually turn to dust

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[–] SlothMama@lemmy.world 10 points 11 months ago

The bodies yes, the shells I imagine were fashioned into exceptional armor locked in ancient vaults.

[–] Cannacheques@slrpnk.net 22 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Because they probably had a great sense of humour, comedy clubs and memes back then too, but hey let's ignore that for just a moment to imagine how hardcore a knight you would have to be to fight off Cthulhu snails

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[–] Lophostemon@aussie.zone 19 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Oh dear. I read that as ‘fisting’ at first.

I picked the wrong day to give up sniffing glue.

[–] postmateDumbass@lemmy.world 9 points 11 months ago

Japan is attacked by sea creatures.

England is besieged by Snailfist and his legion of slime.

[–] A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world 19 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (6 children)

I think we know the real answer.

Humanity was ruled by giant snails and their hyper intelligent queen, and it was only through the bravery of these fine knights were our shackles cast off and the mollusk menace thrown down.

And, in great effort to hide our collective shame, all knowledge about this was intentionally purged, Save for a few manuscripts who managed to be overlooked or were kept in hiding, so hints of humanities true history would be known.

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[–] zqwzzle@lemmy.ca 18 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Did they also take that challenge with the immortal snail?

[–] CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social 17 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Plot twist: its actually the same person making the snail memes today, yet to be caught and looking for new ways to stay one step ahead of the snail

[–] IndiBrony@lemmy.world 13 points 11 months ago (3 children)

one step ahead of the snail

I dare say it shouldn't be very hard to stay one step ahead of a snail.

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[–] Snapz@lemmy.world 15 points 11 months ago

"And if you join our ranks today, they never will!"

-Me, while extending my hand out in invitation for YOU READING THIS to join the...

Associated

Society of

Snail

Hunters and

Ancient

Truth

Seekers

...yes, I know. Yes, we're technically the "A.S.S.H.A.T.S."... Yes very funny, okay, have your moment... It's a secret society okay, so it doesn't actually even come up, nobody will know, it's fine.... IT'S FINE.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 12 points 11 months ago

It's fun to draw. Mine were cowboys fighting snails.

[–] CheeryLBottom@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago

Garden warfare!

[–] asdfasdfasdf@lemmy.world 11 points 11 months ago

I mean, I would guess dragons were a thing because of dinosaur skulls being found a long time ago. There were also giant dinosaur mollusk shells, so maybe this is the equivalent?

[–] darklypure@kbin.social 10 points 11 months ago

Gardeners... Nuff said

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