The trick is to get Chipotle/Qdoba jalapeno spread in the same meal as cryptospora lettuce so you speed-shit it out before the salmonella can settle in.
this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2026
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Whoever wins, we lose.
Salmonella grow faster and will cause the speed shitting first.
Then once the the salmonella weakens the immune system and you start to recover, the cryptospora will fuck you up a week or two later.
They are going to tag team your ass.
Is it currently safe to eat anything? It's like a new outbreak everyday
Grow your own shit.
No seriously, grow your own produce at this point. Tastes better than storebought produce, no need to worry about chemicals getting into your food, and you only need to buy seeds.
I eat shits like you for breakfast.
