nichtsowichtig

joined 1 year ago
[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de -4 points 4 months ago

no, they just foribly impregnate cows every single year of their life, take away their calves the second they are born to take the milk from their overloaded udders until they collapse or stop being comercially viable. Then they are killed. Just like their male children a few weeks after being born.

The milk industry is arguably more cruel than the meat industry. We should reject both

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 48 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I believe Lula and his government appreciates anything that reduces the influence of the US.

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 6 points 5 months ago

Happy birthday!

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 4 points 5 months ago

Someone told me once they used ChatGPT as a tool to practice a language. I thought it was quite invovative

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 4 points 7 months ago

good point. I have already shifted my position on this. Patients won't be able to get their needs met unless they comply, so acting like you like it, or even convincing yourself that you enjoy it is pretty much the only way to get through this process.

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 2 points 7 months ago

ouch, that hurts. But point taken.

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 3 points 7 months ago

Im okay with admitting that, but I would think that you’d have to be pretty vulnerable to share that info

you are right. It is inconsiderate of me to expect people to disclose vulnerabilities in order to have their perspectives validated. I wouldn't want to be treated that way either.

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 2 points 7 months ago

you make good points. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me.

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 2 points 7 months ago (6 children)

thanks for the links. To clarify, I oppose "functioning labels" like "severe" or "mild" autism. However, I think it is important to say that some autistics feel more disabled by their autism than others. Support need vary, and there should be a way to express that. If you have another term that is better, I'm all open to hear that! Finding good terms isn't always easy. Doesn't mean any one is better than the other. I agree with you insofar that any kind of "ranking" - as you say, is very misleading. I am usually called "mildly autistic" when I disclose my autism. Which is not how I experience it. I'd personally be more comfortable with being called a high masking autistic, as it doesn't invalidate my experience as much. Again, I am open for better words here. What I read about people who identify as level 2 or 3 autistics is that it is important to them to make some distinction, as their experience is quite different from people with lower support needs.

You not wanting to listen to them, or not considering them “enough” to satisfy whatever need it is you have (which I genuinely don’t understand), is a you problem.

You misunderstand me here. I precisely want to listen to them. What I am looking for is perspectives from people who dealt with more impairing issues (eg problems getting dressed, basic hygiene, trouble to communicate basic needs etc). I haven't seen the perspectives from these particular people.

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 6 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (8 children)

their positive experiences with gay conversion therapy.

I am not looking for perspectives in favor of it, what I am looking for are any perspectives from people with high support needs, as the debate around it is usually led by either neurotypicals or (comparatively) independent autistics, who in many cases have no first hand experience with ABA. Autistics with high support needs are the ones most affected by ABA, and ironically they have virtually no voice in this debate, which bothered me.

The use of “levels” is also profoundly problematic. Google it.

Which expression do you prefer, then? genuine question. I found the 'levels' to be a better term as it distinguishes by support needs rather than 'intelligence', as the word 'Asperger' suggests. Googling didn't help with that question. Again, let me know what your preferred expression is.

ABA absolutely does not help anyone to learn important skills, but forces people to hide who they are to avoid shame and punishment. It’s abusive, causes trauma, and is not okay.

I read plenty about these things, and that's why I am also concerned. So what I'm looking for is experiences with the people most affected by it.

(edit)

but some of us have been affected by our past experiences and don’t really care to be reminded of them.

Fair point. I added a Content Warning to the post.

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 4 points 7 months ago

yes. It is regared as traumatic and abusive by many, many autistic self-advocates. I'll provide some links later. However, I found one perspective missing. The debate around it is held by either neurotypical people or by autistics with low support needs. So I'd like to know what autistics with higher support needs think and feel about the issue.

 

CW: Post discusses ABA and possibly Trauma, internalized ableism

Hello there! I'm currently researching the issue of ABA. I'm reading a lot about the criticisms, but most of the resources I found so far are (likely) made by level 1 autistics. As level 2 and level 3 autistics are not as well represented within autism self-advocacy, I would like to understand their position better on the topic. A usual defense for ABA is that it can help high-support-needs autistics to learn important skills, but I would like to read about that from an autistic perspective.

So if there are resources on the subject you can recommend, I'll be grateful! thank you

edit: I'm updating because users in this thread changed my view on this issue. I've been caught up in functioning label, which at the end of the day "levels" of autism still are. Here is what changed my mind:

Those needs you are looking for in an autistic person are completely and utterly irrelevant to you as a reader of their experience, and as far as you’re concerned any or all of the people who have already written about their experience of ABA fit in to your narrow and ignorant category, they just didn’t mention it because again - it isn’t fucking relevant.

There is no reason for me to specifically look for "level 2 or 3" autistics since their experiences are valid, regardless of them disclosing their support needs. It is ableist to expect them to disclose to me how "disabled" they are in order for me to validate their experience. Thanks @DessertStorms@kbin.social and @Ransom@lemmy.ca for helping me understand this. So in a way I found the answers I was looking for, and now I have some thinking to do

[–] nichtsowichtig@feddit.de 9 points 8 months ago

I love Vital (Vitalium) and Zyn-Fusion. Surge and Odin are great too. all of them are open source and work great with bitwig.

 

written by Ben Gidley, Daniel Mang, Daniel Randall.

 

I feel a little bad for asking for help again..

So I need to do something. I have no idea what though. So these are things to consider for me:

  • I prefer something regular and scheduled. My Autism needs consistency, but my ADHD makes it really hard to establish and maintain.
  • I need to get out of my home. I am withering here
  • some (predictable) social interaction is okay. If it is too much I probably won't be able to keep up. I'd prefer something with a low upfront social cost (honestly the idea of being introduced to a new group feels overwhelming)
  • I prefer a somewhat sensory friendly environment (for example the music in a gym would be really really stressful)

I would like to know what kinds of things you found in your lives that worked. Thanks!

 

I've spent some time reflecting yesterday and I realized that. When people want you to be confident they don't want you to be actually confident, they want you to pretend you are. It is idiotic and makes no sense, but it explains a lot of situations in which I behaved the wrong way.

confidence to me means the opposite of that. it means questioning your asssumptions, approaching things from a different angle, reflect, recalculate, asking for a second opinion. Because I'll end up with greater confidence that my assertions are more truthful. But apparently doing all that makes people think I'm insecure. Shit!

 

I have been planning for ages to clean up my room and remove the spider but since I've been depressed and my executive dysfunction has been at work, I didn't do anything about it.

Guess what happened today - the spider caught a fly and is happily feasting right now. So turns out I haven't been all alone lately - both the spider and I have been in some kind of hibernation for some time. The spider also doesn't initiate smalltalk so I think it is fair to assume it is autistic too.

Anyway I've posted here lately as I haven't been well, so I'll just let you know that I feel a bit more positive about getting shit done and change things for the better. hugs (for anyone who wants one)!

 

I honestly feel bad posting here again, I feel like a burden. It's just me struggling.. so feel free to skip this post and look at more interesting things

the past two months have been much tougher for me than usual, and when I am not doing well, my capacity to interact with other people is pretty close to zero. I feel a very strong desire to be alone. Having other people notice that I am not well is pretty much the worst thing - I can't talk about what's wrong, and every time I tried my best expressing myself it didn't help. All I really get is advice that does not work for me. So I usually try to pretend I am okay, but at a certain point I can't even really do that anymore.

problem is I'm not living alone. I've skipped quite a number of meals in the past week because I don't want to get into conversations that I don't want to have. I feel like it would be disastrous unmasked, that's why I go this far just to avoid interaction. both of my roommates judge me for spending so much time in my room and I think they tell me to get out every time they see me. I never know how to react to that. Being open about my mental health isn't a good idea - it will end up in them giving me advice that might work for neurotypical, and then they'd blame me if I don't follow their advice. They already kind of do that. I've told one of them about my diagnosis but I don't really think that has no meaning for him.

I feel pathetic skipping dinner anything because I want to avoid social interactions. But in all honesty, I still think it is not worth the stress.

 

All code on the blendermarket is GPL. Yet, it sold over 25 million dollars worth of software. No DRM on the assets, all free software. Free as in freedom, not as in beer. In spite of that, I have not seen once anyone in the blender community complain about piracy, let alone have I seen anyone distribute any software or assets sold on the blendermarket unofficially. It just isn't a problem, or at least not more of a problem than on any other DRMed closed source alternative.

Around 10 years ago the developer of a closed source renderer called Corona ranted about Blender's GPL, as it prevented him from integrating his renderer into Blender without disclosing its source code:

Because entire Blender is covered by GPL licence, it is forbidden to link anything closed-source to it (not just commercial as in "you pay for it", but anything closed-source, which includes "it is free to use, but I won't give you my source code") [...]

We thought there were some loopholes, but it turns out the "Free" Software Foundation thought about them too and explicitly forbidden them. [...]

So, Blender has unusable licence. That is fine, any software developer is entitled to the choice of licence. If somebody wants to make a 3D studio legally usable only while not wearing underwear, he should be able to do it. What makes me angry is the whole FREE software ideology/advertisement. FSF goes on and on about "protecting users freedom". Their interpretation is:

  • being able to choose from free plugins: freedom
  • being able to choose from the same free plugins, plus also commercial plugins: less freedom.
  • Forbidding good Corona renderer integration for Blender is freedom. Allowing it would make Blender less free. [...]

I am not saying the OSS concept is wrong. There are other, much better and really free licences, like MIT/Apache/... If Blender would use any of them, we would start Corona for Blender right now. Too bad it uses the GPL bullshit. I feel bad for Blender users, because they will never have any fully-integrated commercial renderer plugin :/.

He feels bad for what? For users having a thriving software ecosystem with license that ensures it stays free and open forever? The Corona Dev wrote this 10 years ago, probably without realizing that blender was already on its way to become the most widely used 3D application. There are plenty of people making money developing comercial plugins for blender - and they are all GPL.

It makes me think about how much we all have been gaslit by the tech corporations that without DRM and that whole subscription-licenses nightmare is needed because otherwise they would run out of business. It is not true and we can point our fingers to the blender ecosystem to prove them wrong. I don't know.. I haven't seen anyone point this out yet.

2
I feel exhausted (feddit.de)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by nichtsowichtig@feddit.de to c/autism@lemmy.world
 

I am currently in a social event and I am too exhausted to have conversations, so I figured I just pretend I'm busy texting by writing this post. I have to stay here for at least two more hours and I have two more (social) things to do tomorrow.. one of them I'll probably cancel because it is just too much but I did not think of an excuse yet.. I feel dishonest and I really hate it, but I also didn't have really good experiences coming out as autistic.. it has never felt accomodating and often pretty invalidating. My depression has been hitting harder than usual, which is extra hard because I have to pretend I am okay just to avoid interactions I can't handle right now. So anywhere I'm not even trying to make a point here I just need something to keep be busy and not make me look weird. Anyways, wish me luck idk, I'm really not enjoying life a lot rn :I

Edit: thanks a lot everyone! I read the replies several times, it has been reassuring and as a plus it kept me busy yesterday. :)

 

recently two friends of mine brought up autism in a conversation. one of them knows about my diagnosis and the other one is a nurse and regularly works with autistic children.

They brought up lots of things I disagree with and that kind of hurt me.. They said things like "there are severely autistic people and there are others that are pretty chill" "being autistic is fashionable these days" "people use their autism as an excuse for bad behavior" "autistic people should keep their diagnosis for themselves because society is not really ready for that yet"

I tried to argue against it, but I wasn't really good at that. I also didn't feel comfortable to say I am autistic. I felt really devastated when I got back home. I texted one of my friends (the one who knows I am autistic) and said the whole conversation made me feel really bad.

Since she is gay I said that I am feeling the same way you would feel if two of your friends talked about homosexuality the way they talked about autism ("being gay is fashion these days" "people use their homosexuality as an excuse for bad behavior", "gay people should stay in the closet because society is not ready for them"...) She got really angry at me, literally told me to go fuck myself and that I am victimizing myself...

I feel so hurt by this. invalidated. I don't know.. I just wanted to share :I

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