thebardingreen

joined 2 years ago

I would definitely let you play that in my campaign. Also reminds me of that bad guy from One Piece.

[–] thebardingreen@lemmy.starlightkel.xyz 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

If my PCs responded to the clowns this way, I would absolutely make the clowns demons and the "bag of holding" a portal to a circus themed layer of the Abyss. And that's the campaign now.

It turns out the ruler of this layer of the abyss appreciates your lust for violence and mass murder. That's probably not actually... good? For you?

[–] thebardingreen@lemmy.starlightkel.xyz 13 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

That bullet of healing is awesome. Would be great for a supernatural Wild West game. Which, is I think what I want to run next now.

[–] thebardingreen@lemmy.starlightkel.xyz 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Exactly this. Also, one of the clowns will have a trombone to play sad trombone noises at you.

Hammer of Striking. Social bonuses when organizing labor. Combat bonuses only when near many allies.

Pair this with the Sickle of Means. Does double damage and gives Ranger favored enemy bonuses against employers, nobility, land owners and clerics, so long as the wielder forswears ever becoming any of those things. When used to harvest grain, doubles the speed at which grain can be harvested and magically doubles the final yield of the harvest as well. However, if the grain is not freely and equitably distributed (especially if the wielder charges for it), the next time they use the sickle they will immediately fumble and critically hit themselves for max damage.

[–] thebardingreen@lemmy.starlightkel.xyz 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

Wrong. Fuck printers. Fuck everything about them, from the tree death camps, to the overpriced proprietary ink to the way manufacturers have done fuck-all about fixing their known wifi glitches for literally 30 years. Thank god I'm at a point in my career where the only people who want me to troubleshoot printers are my family, and what I charge them for it is having to listen to me scornfully rant that if you figure out how to work without a printer, Hewlett-Packard has a problem but if you don't YOU have a problem. A bunch of problems, given how frequently my dad and sister beg for support. My wife got sick enough of the rant that she finally stopped using hers, it's been sitting on a shelf in our garage for the last two years. I think she's frustrated about not being able to print sometimes, but oh well, she can go to Kinko's or walk over to my dad's house and use his (which will result in me getting a phone call "Hey @thebard, your wife is here trying to print something and the printer's not working, we tried turning it off and on, but it still won't print, can you..."

[–] thebardingreen@lemmy.starlightkel.xyz 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

As a diabolical GM, I can think of so many ways to make these strategies backfire. :D

[–] thebardingreen@lemmy.starlightkel.xyz 84 points 1 week ago (19 children)

A potion of True Healing... heals 1d8+2 damage, recipient MUST truthfully answer the next question they are asked. Sell the characters 6, but don't tell them about the truth serum. Let them figure it out on their own.

Boots of Elvenkind... except Elves can hear you.

A bag of holding that contains infinite clowns. Every time it is opened, 1d4 clowns come out. The clowns are useless in combat and attempt to distract, annoy and mock the holder. While this could be used as a distraction, the clowns will follow the holder, drawing attention to them. You could create a table for what kind of clowns you get (mime clowns, pie throwing clowns, balloon animal clowns, magician clowns, etc). The clowns will wander off after 1d6 minutes. Where the clowns go and what they are (Illusions? Demons?) is unknown.

[–] thebardingreen@lemmy.starlightkel.xyz 42 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Druid: You guys go on ahead. I'm gonna um... Commune. With this tree.

[–] thebardingreen@lemmy.starlightkel.xyz 3 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

"The blood of Christ reduces you to a pile of ash. No, there's no way to resist. Make a new character. Dumbass."

-Any decent storyteller in this situation.

 

Not me. I have a client who's a very sweet old lady who's business is doing real bio science to treat cancer patients with cannabis extracts.

She's very easily frustrated with technical problems and definitely has the boomer attitude that if you buy something expensive, it means it's good. But she's been getting more and more pissed about enshittification and big software companies screwing over their customers over the last couple years. Adobe's new TOU has her hopping mad. She has all the research papers she's worked on over the last 20 years in Creative Cloud.

I've been consulting with her off and on for six years and she will get SUPER frustrated with glitches and trouble shooting. I don't think there's anything out there that will work for her to ditch Adobe. But I thought I'd ask here, see if there's anything she might try.

 

The goal is actually that I'm able to hook my ticket tracking system (I'm using Zammad) to various ToDo lists I can expose to other people. I'm happy to write middleware to make that work, but I don't want to write a whole ToDo app.

Needs to be able to track multiple lists that can be shared in a granular way (I want to share some lists with some people and other lists with other people).

 

A client of mine is getting harassed, we think by her former attorney who she's suing for embezzlement.

Someone is posting fake resumes for her and applying for jobs and she gets daily emails and call backs. Is there anything to do short of either ignoring it or playing whack-a-mole?

She's a very sweet old lady who is freaked out by this and doesn't deserve it.

 

I've been warming up to switching to GrapheneOS for months. Last month I bought a Pixel 8 (which is the buggiest effing phone I've ever owned, good job Google). I've just been waiting to have the bandwidth.

But with Google sunsetting Google Podcasts, I've decided to make time next week. Podcasts are a MAJOR part of my daily functioning.

 

I have read a TON of contemporary SciFi authors. I really enjoy

Stuff I like

Iain M. Banks

I liked the Martha Wells Murderbot books.

I loved We Are Legion, We Are Bob and have read all the books by him.

I like Alastair Reynolds. I liked the Poseidon's Children trilogy better than Revalation Space Series (but I liked that too).

I really like G. S. Jennsen - even though she's cheesy. I think I like her because of her progressive attitude and powerful female characters.

I like Charles Stross, but I didn't like Accelerando. I like his other books a lot.

I liked A Memory Called Empire and A Desolation Called Peace by Arkady Martine.

I like Corey Doctorow, sometimes. Walkaway was good.

I like Daniel Suarez, most of the time for similar reasons.

I REALLY liked the Nexus series by Ramez Naam.

I liked the Red Rising books by Pierce Brown and I've really been enjoying the Sollan Empire books by Christopher Ruocchio, which I think are similar and even better.

I like Adrian Tchaikovsky and really liked The Final Architecture books and Doorways to Eden.(I didn't get that into Children of Time though).

I usually like Neil Stephenson. (The Fall or Dodge In Hell is quite a tedious book).

I've liked everything I've read by Verner Vinge.

I liked Hyperion like everybody else. Unlike everybody else, I think I liked the Endymion books even better.

I read some Ken MacLeod (the first Corporation Wars book) and it was fine... but I haven't felt like going back.

I REALLY enjoy John Scalzi, though I found the Old Man's War books started to get stale after a while. It's high calorie, low nutrition brain candy, but I know that going in and it passes the time.

I really liked Derek Kunsken's Quantum Magician books. And started reading his prequel series, set on Venus, and I couldn't really get into it.

I enjoy Space Race books like Erik Flint / Ryk Spoor's Boundary series, Saturn Run by John Sanford and Delta V by Daniel Suarez.

I love the Expanse.

I find Kim Stanley Robinson hit or miss. I really enjoyed the Mars books and The Years of Rice and Salt was fun (though a little tedious). 2312 drags and drags and nothing happens and Aurora is the same AND also sad.

I liked Permanence by Karl Schroeder. It could have used a little more... conflict? I had this same problem with Becky Chambers. The characters are all too well intentioned and the dramatic tension suffered a little.

I read all the Star Kingdom books by Lindsay Buroker. I thought they were a super fun adventure that just kept delivering from the beginning of the series to the end, even if it was clearly aimed at a more YA demographic.

I REALLY liked Velocity Weapon and the sequels by Megan O'Keefe. I found her Steam Punk series much less impressive. I've been meaning to try her galactic empire series, but I haven't quite been in the mood to start it.

I read Sue Burke's Semiosis Duology. I wasn't expecting to like it but I really did! The physical science aspects were a little softer than I would have liked, but the biological science was really cool, as was the anarcho-pacifist political philosophy.

I read Yoon Ha Lee's Ninefox Gambit and the sequels. I thought they were really fun, I wish they'd explored Calendrical technology more.

I thought the Neo G books by KB Wagers (A Pale Light in the Black and sequels) were good. Her characters are great. But again, very light on the sciences and technology. I'm in the mood for something harder. Also, not realistic that the champion hand to hand fighter in the entire Earth space military is a 110 pound woman, but I just pretended she's cyber enhanced.

I just finished the Wormwood trilogy (Rosewater and sequels) by Tade Thomson. They were great.

Stuff I Don't Like

Orson Scott Card did not age well, unlike Timothy Zahn, who's gotten a lot more progressive in his story telling in the last two decades.

I don't like Niel Asher. His in your face Libertarianism and conservative ideology annoys me, which is too bad because other than that he's a good story teller.

I find Peter F. Hamilton hit or miss for the same reason. But I really liked Pandora's Star.

I find AG Riddle hit or miss. I like his thought experiments, but he doesn't really care if his stories / characters are logically consistent. Ramez Naam and Daniel Suarez do what Riddle does but WAAAY better.

I didn't like Blindsight. I know, this makes me some kind of heretic. I just didn't find the idea of such a dysfunctional crew being entrusted with such an important mission believable.

I couldn't get into Ann Leckie. I WANTED to like it, but I just didn't find her writing very engaging. I've put the physical book down once AND turned the audio book off on a road trip.

I did not like Tamsyn Muir.

I did not like the Three Body Problem, although I see the appeal and it's nice to read something by a non western author. I found the pro Chinese politics a little too heavy handed.

I cannot get into Greg Egan. I find his writing style way too obtuse. Reading is Egan is like having a PHD in mathematics and a PHD in quantum physics, then going to Burning Man and doing 16 hits of acid.

I finally got around to trying The Long Way To A Small Angry Planet and I could NOT get into it. I agree with reviewers who complain nothing interesting ever happens.

People keep recommending Mary Robinette Kowal, but something about the alternate history just doesn't grab me.

People keep recommending Ted Chiang. But I don't want short stories (Murderbot somehow managed to be an exception). The longer the better.

People have recommended the Last Watch by J. S. Dewes, but others have told me things about the book that makes me think I won't like it. Standing guard at the edge of the universe makes zero sense, I think by proposing it's possible you lost me. Edge of the galaxy... Maybe, with 10 septillion robotic war ships. But edge of the universe? I think I'm out. If you know something I don't about this book, feel free to say so.

 
 

No really, these books are what you get if you answer the question "What if after the Mist came, the surviving humans rebuilt a Steampunk civilization with magic airships and uplifted cats?"

I was gonna say this is now my head canon, but I actually think he's so obvious about drawing the connections in this book it's a little beyond head canon.

Anyway, since I feel sure it will come up if I start a conversation about these books on Lemmy, feel free to use the space below ↓ to hate on Jim Butcher for his MenWritingWomen problems... They're real and they bug me too. They just don't stop him from telling a fun and engaging story, which this was for me.

 

view more: ‹ prev next ›