Dad Jokes

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143 users here now

Description

This is a community for sharing those cheesy “dad” jokes that invoke an eye roll or chuckle.

Rules

Clean jokes only please. If you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old, you probably shouldn’t post it here. Please post edgier jokes to !unclejokes@lemmy.world
Must post text, image (e.g., meme), or direct link. Do not post external links that cannot be viewed directly from the community (e.g., link to joke website, Facebook, Instagram, etc.)
Follow Lemmy.World Code of Conduct

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

loopy@lemmy.world

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Post text, images, or direct links only (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago by loopy@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

1 comments fedilink

Please see the updated sidebar. Do not post external links to websites such as Facebook and Instagram.

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Please post edgier jokes to the new Uncle Jokes community (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago by loopy@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

7 comments fedilink

I just updated the sidebar. As a rule of thumb, if you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old, you should probably post it to the new community !unclejokes@lemmy.world

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I just bought a brand new belt, and it doesn't fit. (lemm.ee)

submitted 1 day ago by melissa_limoncella@lemm.ee to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

4 comments fedilink

Huge waist.

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Did you hear about the new broom model that was released? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 3 days ago by TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

4 comments fedilink

It's sweeping the nation.

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What do you call a dog that is also a magician? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 3 days ago by TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

5 comments fedilink

A labra-cadabra-dor.

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I used to hate facial hair... (lemmy.world)

submitted 5 days ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

2 comments fedilink

but then it grew on me.

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An ant's gender can be determined by throwing it in water. If it sinks, girl ant. (lemmy.world)

submitted 5 days ago by rtxn@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

7 comments fedilink

If it floats, buoyant.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 5 days ago by TheImpressiveX@lemmy.ml to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

2 comments fedilink

A teacher says, "Spit out your gum." A train says, "Chew, chew, chew."

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Ultra-marathon (lemmy.world)

submitted 6 days ago by FlyingSquid@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

8 comments fedilink

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I couldn't figure out why the frisbee was getting bigger. (ttrpg.network)

submitted 5 days ago by ZDL@ttrpg.network to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

0 comments fedilink

Then it struck me.

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I heard Godzilla has a son. (ttrpg.network)

submitted 1 week ago by ZDL@ttrpg.network to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

2 comments fedilink

Jesuszilla.

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ENGLISH MUFFIN:… (lemmy.dbzer0.com)

submitted 1 week ago by SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

6 comments fedilink

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Bad formatting:( (lemmy.dbzer0.com)

submitted 1 week ago by SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

6 comments fedilink

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Life finds a way (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago by Jonnyprophet@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

1 comments fedilink

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I have the memory of an elephant. (ttrpg.network)

submitted 1 week ago by ZDL@ttrpg.network to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

8 comments fedilink

I saw it in the zoo a few years back.

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How much can a lemon-sized bladder hold? (sh.itjust.works)

submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by brown567@sh.itjust.works to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

4 comments fedilink

LMNOP

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My friend is pretty weird. The other day he was looking for a clock to put in his belt (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago by ConstantPain@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

2 comments fedilink

I told him it was a waist of time.

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I tried starting a hot air balloon business (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 week ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

6 comments fedilink

But it never took off

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What did the trucker say when their tire fell off? (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

10 comments fedilink

You picked a fine time to leave me loose wheel.

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How do cats keep up with local events,? (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

9 comments fedilink

The evening mews.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

17 comments fedilink

Fsh

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Why is molecular science so untrustworthy? (lemm.ee)

submitted 2 weeks ago by Corno@lemm.ee to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

7 comments fedilink

Atoms make up everything.

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What do you call a person that eats only offal? (feddit.nl)

submitted 2 weeks ago by Akasazh@feddit.nl to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

3 comments fedilink

An Organist

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If you’re American when you go in the bathroom… (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 weeks ago by Kintarian@lemmy.world to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

7 comments fedilink

… and American when you come out, what are you while you're in the bathroom?

European.

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Which bees make milk? (lemm.ee)

submitted 2 weeks ago by sag@lemm.ee to c/dadjokes@lemmy.world

4 comments fedilink

BooBees