this post was submitted on 14 Jul 2026
471 points (99.4% liked)

196

6504 readers
1912 users here now

Community Rules

You must post before you leave

Be nice. Assume others have good intent (within reason).

Block or ignore posts, comments, and users that irritate you in some way rather than engaging. Report if they are actually breaking community rules.

Use content warnings and/or mark as NSFW when appropriate. Most posts with content warnings likely need to be marked NSFW.

Most 196 posts are memes, shitposts, cute images, or even just recent things that happened, etc. There is no real theme, but try to avoid posts that are very inflammatory, offensive, very low quality, or very "off topic".

Bigotry is not allowed, this includes (but is not limited to): Homophobia, Transphobia, Racism, Sexism, Abelism, Classism, or discrimination based on things like Ethnicity, Nationality, Language, or Religion.

Avoid shilling for corporations, posting advertisements, or promoting exploitation of workers.

Proselytization, support, or defense of authoritarianism is not welcome. This includes but is not limited to: imperialism, nationalism, genocide denial, ethnic or racial supremacy, fascism, Nazism, Marxism-Leninism, Maoism, etc.

Avoid AI generated content.

Avoid misinformation.

Avoid incomprehensible posts.

No threats or personal attacks.

No spam.

Moderator Guidelines

Moderator Guidelines

  • Don’t be mean to users. Be gentle or neutral.
  • Most moderator actions which have a modlog message should include your username.
  • When in doubt about whether or not a user is problematic, send them a DM.
  • Don’t waste time debating/arguing with problematic users.
  • Assume the best, but don’t tolerate sealioning/just asking questions/concern trolling.
  • Ask another mod to take over cases you struggle with, if you get tired, or when things get personal.
  • Ask the other mods for advice when things get complicated.
  • Share everything you do in the mod matrix, both so several mods aren't unknowingly handling the same issues, but also so you can receive feedback on what you intend to do.
  • Don't rush mod actions. If a case doesn't need to be handled right away, consider taking a short break before getting to it. This is to say, cool down and make room for feedback.
  • Don’t perform too much moderation in the comments, except if you want a verdict to be public or to ask people to dial a convo down/stop. Single comment warnings are okay.
  • Send users concise DMs about verdicts about them, such as bans etc, except in cases where it is clear we don’t want them at all, such as obvious transphobes. No need to notify someone they haven’t been banned of course.
  • Explain to a user why their behavior is problematic and how it is distressing others rather than engage with whatever they are saying. Ask them to avoid this in the future and send them packing if they do not comply.
  • First warn users, then temp ban them, then finally perma ban them when they break the rules or act inappropriately. Skip steps if necessary.
  • Use neutral statements like “this statement can be considered transphobic” rather than “you are being transphobic”.
  • No large decisions or actions without community input (polls or meta posts f.ex.).
  • Large internal decisions (such as ousting a mod) might require a vote, needing more than 50% of the votes to pass. Also consider asking the community for feedback.
  • Remember you are a voluntary moderator. You don’t get paid. Take a break when you need one. Perhaps ask another moderator to step in if necessary.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] GiveOver@feddit.uk 17 points 1 day ago (8 children)

Why is this usage of tea so confusing for everybody? We re-use words all the time in English. It's a very simple concept. Imagine if a musician asked about the key of a song and everybody was like "KEY? LIKE A CAR KEY? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? SONGS DONT HAVE KEYS! IVE NEVER BEEN SO CONFUSED IN MY LIFE"

Up north we say "tea" for evening meal. That's it. Explanation sorted.

[–] Beehaw_Girl@beehaw.org 1 points 36 minutes ago* (last edited 36 minutes ago)

Because we already have a word that exists for evening meal. It's dinner. Or supper. Why call it a beverage?

[–] tutter@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 9 hours ago

bruh because it's confusing that a meal is named after a beverage, it's not the double naming that's confusing

[–] Soulg@ani.social 43 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Terrible example and it's just demonstrating that you can't put yourself in someone else's shoes for even a moment.

You understand that usage of tea because you used it your entire life, someone who hasn't would rightfully be confused.

[–] J92@lemmy.world 1 points 10 hours ago

Not OP, but out of interest, if you are from the UK, what did you call the (primarily) women who served food in school at around noon?

[–] GiveOver@feddit.uk 10 points 23 hours ago (2 children)

Ok it was a deliberately silly example for emphasis. Here's a real example. I went to Australia once and in the airport somebody referred to my Mentos as "lolly". To me, lollies are on a stick. Apparently not to aussies. It threw me off for half a second, but that's it. Confused is an overstatement.

[–] sem@piefed.blahaj.zone 8 points 14 hours ago

Imagine you are cooking a chicken. Your flatmate walks in, sees what you're doing, and says, oh, are you making coffee?

You wouldn't be just a little bit confused at first?

[–] theneverfox@pawb.social 11 points 22 hours ago

Yeah but the context clues are a hell of a lot easier there. You're holding an object, and if someone called it a chupa-chupa or a sucker most people would be able to put that together pretty easily

Now imagine you're going through stretches and someone walks in and is like "oh, playing football are you". You could be preparing to go outside and play football... But you're just stretching

I think most people would be confused by that unexpected second meaning of a familiar word

[–] rtxn@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago

But when my Irish friend wants to smoke a cigarette, everybody loses their fucking mind.

[–] 9point6@lemmy.world 6 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah, but as someone who grew up down south and has lived in the north for the majority of my life:

Breakfast, lunch, dinner

Very clear, no fucker doesn't know what you're talking about

Breakfast, dinner, tea

What the fuck are you playing at, skipping lunch and having a drink to compensate?

Get in the sea

Tea is important enough in this country to not use the word again, especially not for the second most important thing: dinner

[–] GiveOver@feddit.uk 0 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Breakfast, lunch, dinner

Dinner is at midday, what are you playing at having 2 meals at midday and no evening meal? Get back to France

[–] pirc_lover@feddit.uk 3 points 21 hours ago (1 children)

I am also someone who grew up down south and we always had breakfast, lunch and tea \o/

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 2 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah, it’s actually more based around industrialisation than a north/south thing. I think the Cornish miners also came home for noon dinner as the main meal of the day and then had tea in the evening.

[–] pirc_lover@feddit.uk 1 points 1 hour ago

That tracks as I’m in the south west

[–] basxto@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It still confuses me that I can have a cup of coffee with somebody without actually drinking coffee. (In English and my mother tongue as well.)

[–] infinitesunrise@slrpnk.net 7 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago) (2 children)

As a coffee drinker, if I was invited for some coffee and did not in fact get any coffee I'd be both a little confused and a little annoyed.

[–] MrEnitity@sopuli.xyz 4 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

In Brazil, "café da manhã" (morning coffee) is the term for breakfast, but it's often shortened to just "café."

There was a mobile blood donation set up during Covid and I asked the group chat if it was okay to have coffee before donating, and the response was, "Yes, you should definitely be well-fed before donating blood."

[–] sem@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 14 hours ago

That's pretty good!

Is the context where if you had said can i drink coffee before, it would have been less ambiguous?

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 2 points 18 hours ago (2 children)

Yeah once a date invited me up for coffee and I was enjoying my time with her and thought another 15 minutes or so of conversation would be nice, but then it was suddenly like she forgot she invited me in or something because she just started getting ready for bed instead of making any coffee! I just politely said I needed to get going so she didn't feel embarrassed about forgetting she had invited me for coffee, though I think I failed because she did seem a bit upset.

So I tried to be considerate and go through a coffee shop drivethru after the next couple of dates. Even then, she offered coffee the first time and I pointed at my cup and said I'm fine, though that seemed to make her feel even more embarrassed as she looked like she was about to cry after that.

Then the next time she said, "I think we've been having a miscommunication when I've been inviting you up for coffee, I didn't really mean coffee, but I was being a bit immature and dancing around what I really wanted and then getting my feelings hurt when you didn't get the message. So I'll just say what I mean this time. Would you like to come up and have sex with me?"

I informed her that's where babies come from and she already knew and still wanted it. Then she was trying to say something about being on a pill and I noped out of there. I am not interested in a relationship where my partner likes to get high on pills and have babies. That just seems irresponsible to me.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 1 points 28 minutes ago

Ok yeah my cultural blinders were on here, I totally forgot that here in America coffee can mean sex

[–] Sarcasmo220@lemmy.ml 5 points 15 hours ago

You put in a lot of effort on this joke so I'll give an upvote and this comment

[–] Nouvellalia@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

It's ok how much you like tea. I'm sorry they hurt you about it. Tea is super neat and fun and good. You are super neat and fun and good.

[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 2 points 23 hours ago

Isn't "key" for a lock like, as old as modern English?