this post was submitted on 15 Jul 2026
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Not The Onion

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[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 19 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Let me guess, Pistol Pete is going to do the assessments personally, by cupping the balls of only the most manly of soldiers, because he can judge the amount of testosterone by the weight.

RFK, Jr showed them how to do it, he's been doing it all his life, and they all had a hilarious night in the Oval Office, practicing on each other. Stephen "PeeWee Himmler" Miller had the tiniest balls, and cried about it. It was hilarious.

Good times, good times...

[–] CADmonkey@lemmy.world 7 points 16 hours ago

I can't prove you wrong, so I have decided that this is what really happened.