this post was submitted on 02 Nov 2026
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Parenting
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She shouldn't be taught to hit back either! They're 4 years old
Again, in an ideal world you would be right. But that's not the world we live in. Yes, seek nonviolent solutions first. But pacifism only tells the bad people that they can abuse you with impunity.
Which is exactly what's happening.
They are 4 years old
They are being punched.
And the teachers need to do something about that. Teaching this little boy to hit back when he's scared isn't going to solve the problem you think it is. It's going to cause more problems for that boy in his life.
Right now he's being taught that hitting kids is okay because someone is hitting him and nothing is being done about it.
You're right. He should just tell her that it makes him feel bad when she does that. That'll work.
The adults need to take more action.
It probably would work because small children are incredibly empathetic when you communicate effectively. They understand boo-boos and that they don’t like to be hit, so they shouldn’t hit. It takes patience and consistency. Something that violent people don’t have much practice in.
Patience and consistency and getting hit all the time while you wait.