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If you liked "Florida Man", you're gonna love "Florida Woman"
It's not the Sunshine State when there's an eclipse going on. Doh!
A meeting technicality!
We put the Wo in Man!
If God told her to then it should be legal.
Yeah, I mean, the divine commandment kind of places her in a difficult position. God doesn't have a lot of tolerance of people that don't do what He wants them to.
Genesis 38:6-10
there was also that time that Elisha, when a certain king came to him to; basically, cast auguries. (oh yeah, that's not wish craft when a prophet does it, huh?) so he tell this king... who god doesn't really like anyhow.... to shoot an arrow out the window. "Oh good. you'll defeat that one asshole. now, take up a bundle of arrows. hit the ground."
Of course, the king, being used to weird rituals and stuff, strikes the ground 3 times. (what's not mentioned is why- 3 is a holy number. You see it in all sorts of places in semetic religions.)
So elisha says to him, "You idiot, you should have struck the ground more times. five or six, at least. Now... you'll beat that other asshole 3 times, but you won't defeat him totally. so, you know. He's gonna come back."
so, basically, god decided to let the israelites suffer under some douchenozzle's rule because.... his prophet couldn't give clear instructions and the king went for symbolism over maximum effort....
It breaks my brain to remember that I was raised to believe this garbage
Onan is such a wanker!
It's dumb that this story got turned into an anti-masturbation edict. Onan was pulling out because he wanted his brother's inheritance, he was punished for his greed.