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My wife cried during America Ferrara's speech. That shit really hit home for women.
"It is literally impossible to be a woman. You are so beautiful, and so smart, and it kills me that you don't think you're good enough. Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow we're always doing it wrong.
You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can't ask for money because that's crass. You have to be a boss, but you can't be mean. You have to lead, but you can't squash other people's ideas. You're supposed to love being a mother, but don't talk about your kids all the damn time. You have to be a career woman but also always be looking out for other people.
You have to answer for men's bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you're accused of complaining. You're supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you're supposed to be a part of the sisterhood.
But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So find a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful.
You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line. It's too hard! It's too contradictory and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault. "
The video is more impactful:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBqlDWHkdHk
That, to me, is sort of what women are supposed to say because they're emphasizing the idea that they're not supposed to say it. I dunno. Women do experience difficult things, but doesn't everyone? I wouldn't choose to switch. I did just recently realize that men (the ones i asked) are rarely scared and that was kind of a shock to me.
My husband hasn't seen the movie. Maybe I'll put it on and see if my opinion changes with a rewatch.
Of course everyone faces difficulty, everyone faces expectations and trials. They're not the same for everyone, though. And there are unique, and often much more challenging ones, for women.
I found it something I empathized greatly with, even if it didn't describe my trials and tribulations exactly. Because it still mirrored them.
I just cried again reading it, and I've seen the movie 3 times. That speech is so good.
For me, I REALLY related to the entire speech, so I would've sobbed anyway. But America Ferrera giving the speech made it even more impactful for me. When she was on Ugly Betty, I remember people were really mean online and harshly judged her looks and body type, so the speech felt personal.
There is definitely room for a similar speech about men and toxic masculinity, and the way men are made to feel like they have to be strong and stable all the time. But the speech in Barbie wasn't about them. It felt like it was for me, for my teenage daughter, for my friends, and for all the men with women in their lives that they love.
Life can be really hard, and I was stunned by the "I don't get it" crowd. She spells it out pretty clearly. It's hard not to get.