this post was submitted on 01 Aug 2024
527 points (96.5% liked)

Not The Onion

12224 readers
954 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] Hyphlosion@donphan.social 0 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I’ve “snuck” quite a bit of snackage with me when I go to my local theater. (Especially because they rarely offer anything on my diet.) I put that in quote marks because I’m sure they can easily tell I’m smuggling my own stuff in.

I’ve always reckoned that they let me by because they’re not paid enough to really care. Thankfully I have yet to run into a theater worker on a power trip.

I guess it also helps that I do buy myself drinks while I’m there.

But man, I’d probably shit my pants if they called the cops on me just because I brought my own zero sugar smoked sausages and some pumpkin seeds…

[–] Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca 2 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I remember sitting in front of two of my wife's friends during a movie once, when I was overcome by the smell of McDonald's fries. One of them had retrieved a box of fries from the other's purse once the coast was clear.

[–] Nikz@lemm.ee 4 points 3 months ago

I used to go to the local dollar store and grab myself a can of coke and some lollies (candy) on my way to the theater. In England, right before the movie starts, they have the rating card come up for a few seconds. It's always the most quiet time because the movie is about to start, so no one is taking, there's no movie playing yet, and the ads / trailers are over. I would always open my coke at this moment of silence because it was so funny to me to be sitting in a room full or silent strangers and for the only noise to clearly be the sound of a can opening that no one could see was just a coke.