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You don't know the context, because OP didn't provide any details of what was being discussed. It's entirely possible that it was a valid call in some or all of those situations.
I do know enough of the context to back up what I said, because the poster did provide enough details through the post. Like this:
Parse the above and you get the context - OP is talking about debating multiple topics with different people, and found what they believe to be a pattern on the usage of the word when there's a fight.
Remember - just like the context provides information to interpret the text, the text also provides information to determine the context.
As shown above, OP is claiming to have found a pattern across multiple discussions. As such, "what was being discussed" is not relevant here.
Yeah, nah.
Outside psychoanalysis this "waaaaah ur projectin" shite is on the same tier as name calling, "NO U", whataboutism and similar crap. It's fallacious, and it assumes shit about the other person. It is not a valid argument, it's condensed idiocy.
Side note: while anecdotal I can confirm, independently from OP, that people often use this "waaah projection!" pseudo-defence a bit too often when discussing.