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Boomers spent their lives accumulating stuff. Now their kids are stuck with it.
(www.businessinsider.com)
this post was submitted on 27 Oct 2024
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I know it's hard, I'm not trivializing it, but no one (edit adult) should be treated like a child. It only happens to those who let it happen. (The alternative is distancing)
Edit I mean adults shouldn't be treated like children.
One can feel how one feels, however, the boomer generation's brains are locked in a time loop. They can't be changed. It's like visiting someone with alzheimers. It's quite sad and frustrating.
Oddly, the silent generation peeps are more adaptable.
Huh? You decide how you are treated. Even by your parents. I've had good conversations with my now aged and forgetful parents where I clarify how I want to be spoken to.
Edit not all boomers have Alzheimer's
Sorry, that's not how it works with people stuck in a loop. It's a very American problem, if you aren't American. Not sure if it was the leaded gas, or what, but some people are just broken. The person you want to change needs to want to, and be able to change for your idealism to work. Otherwise you're just building a delusion around a fixed point to fit your viewpoint while that person remains unchanged.
It's terribly sad, really.
That's just ageism, with a nationalist(?) crust.
There's lots of dumb boomers. There's lots of Alzheimeric boomers. There's lots of smart, respectful boomers.
Suggesting an entire generation can't respect others is junk.
Imagine you subbed out "boomer" for a race. It'd be insane to say.
Tons of boomers have completely accepted 2024, their children, and their choices. You apparently just haven't met them.
I wonder if the comment you're replying to applies to the people who downvoted yours.
Or it's only selective to the people they don't know yet decided to hate. Sad really.
As good for me as going no contact would be, I love my parents and do alot to keep them in my life.
A terrible weakness. If only I could be strong like you.
I never said go no contact, edit or that I was some model of strength. I'm just an adult.
Just consistently assert the standards you as an adult want to live in.
I can't even get folks to use the right pronouns for me. I have no hope of getting my narcissistic mother to treat me as an adult. She won't even believe me about basic facts about, for example, about how my city's public transit works (facts listed on a very large poster she could read herself) if they contradict her first impressions.
I'm taking this as solicited conversation as we are still here. I also assume you are an adult.
I've dealt with this. If they use the wrong pronouns, or otherwise infantilize you, you calmly and respectfully say "mom we've discussed that I'm not going to be spoken to in that way. If you must, I'll be leaving and we can try again tomorrow". Then you get up to leave if they don't correct, and try again tomorrow. No fighting, no yelling.
You do not deserve to be disrespected.
No worries. "No contact" is the only path to a peaceful existence with my mom. I've tried working with her and it doesn't take. Latest example of why I should just lose her number which happened just now: I missed a text from her then got one less than 24 hours later saying
That's gross dude on a dating site behavior. Tbh, if it was important she could have called or emailed.
Anyways, I'm going to treat her like a gross date and lose her number. This isn't the first time she's threatened to go no-contact and I see no reason to protest.
That's a tough one. Good luck dude / dudette / duderino
Thanks. She's blocked everywhere I can think of. I'm going to be a messy feelings blob today and that's ok. I have coffee and chocolate.
It took ~~10~~7 years of low-contact to go to no-contact. I'm not making this choice lightly. She just sucks that much.
And I'm going to steal "duderino". It's mine now.
Hard disagree. Children should be treated as children, not parentified.
I mean adults. I was unclear. Editing.
Some of us do it to help our surviving parent who can't handle all the stuff the other parent collected.