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What is your routine like? Do you go to work? Volunteer? Have hobbies?
I ask this because going through a breakup — any breakup — involves a grieving process. Part of grieving is about moving on. A big part of doing that is finding new things to do, new people to talk to, and new things to talk about.
Counseling is good, but talking to other friends and family about her can make it very difficult. If you meet someone new — doesn’t have to be romantic, can be any gender, can just be a friend — can give you a person to talk to and topics to discuss that involve you and your interests and have nothing to do with her.
When you’re in a relationship for a long time a lot of your thoughts and even the objects around you in life get tangled up in that so that when she’s gone these things still remind you of her. What you need is to be selfish — grieving is a selfish process — because you need to reorient your mindset around yourself and taking care of yourself.
Lastly, I think it’s also helpful to have a third space where you can focus on stuff completely outside yourself and all that. For me it’s been volunteering as a tutor for high school kids. It gives me a time and a space each week to forget about everything and focus on something else. Helping kids and seeing them learn is a nice bonus for that. That may not be your cup of tea though, but something else may be! If you aren’t already into volunteering I’d encourage you to look into some volunteer organizations near you and try to find one that fits your interests.