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Lack of empathy is not something people grow out of, it seems like it is something that grows more severe the older people get.
While that can certainly be true, I would say I've gained more empathy as I got older. I was never hateful, but I probably was more dismissive entering adulthood. I didn't understand what I had when I was younger and thought everyone should be able to do what I did and just didn't for some reason I didn't understand. Over time I realized how wrong I was. I saw what advantages I had that led me to where I was, and how many MANY people didn't have those same things, and that expecting them to have equal success was unrealistic and shameful on my part.
It is so easy for life to knock a human off course or keep them off course. An injury, addiction, an abusive family member, poverty, chronic illness, genetic disorder, political instability, bigotry, victim of crime, economic recession, or a natural disaster. Any one of these things and more can do it. I had little to no concept of these when I was younger. Growing up, meeting people, learning about the world, learning history made me much more open to others suffering and the desire to use what I have been lucky enough to have to help others, and recognize we, as a society, must help others. Its the only way we'll all survive. Divided we fall.
I can say the same for myself, I just don't see it as often as I had hoped in others.
I reflect on my past self and wish I had been a better person in my teens/early 20s. I can't change who I was or how I behaved or thought back then but I can change the person I am now and who I aspire to be. I am also trying to foster that attitude and the skills to be empathetic in my kids.
I'm more empathetic now than I was 40 years ago.
People don't become less empathetic as they get older. They were assholes already.