this post was submitted on 08 Jun 2025
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I know I keep posting over and over but I’m in so much pain and I have no one or nowhere to go to when I am sad. I’m trying to channel everything internally without being such a burden and annoyance to people. I keep asking myself “why didn’t he fight for me and his relationship?” “Why am I so easy to be given up on?” “Was I even special to him?” … I cannot stop crying. I feel hopeless right now. When we stopped talking for a couple days and I reached out for closure, he said not speaking for those three days makes him realize he should’ve been more appreciative of me and how hard I tried and all those things. But if he was saying those things then why not turn it around? 😔I sound like a hopeless romantic but I can’t wrap my head around anything anymore… the closure somehow made it worse I guess. I told him I forgive him for anything he thinks he did wrong. He appreciated that. I miss him so much. I miss our memories, I miss his face. Something deep down inside of me feels like I’m going to see his face again but I know that’s false reality. We never even got to talk to each other about these things in person. I just want to cry in his arms.

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[–] canadianchik@lemm.ee 1 points 3 hours ago

this make me cry, thank you. It’s been so hard to see things clearly. I keep asking myself if I’m really that hard to love. The main question I ask myself is “Am I really that easy to give up on?”.. I bent over backwards so much for people but I never receive it back. My heart is always shattered by the people I love the most. Regular friendships I had didn’t hurt when they decided to not speak or whatever, but the ones where I actually love the person deeply kills the fuck out of me. It it seems to always happen to me and it sucks because it takes so long for me to love someone on that level. So when it happens I just know it won’t happen for another while :/