Kid has a penis and is 1wk old. I feel like the day to day right now is just making sure he's not sitting in his own piss/shit and feeding him until he passes out every 2-3 hrs. He's 1wk old so I don't know when I'm supposed to start stimulating him, but there's very little awake time that isn't either "I'm sitting in my own peepoo"..."my ping pong sized stomach is empty"...or just crying for whatever reason other than the first two. It seems every time he feeds, he conks out until the next feeding/diaper change so I take great pride in creating a tit milk drunk baby that passes tfo (pumping only *will explain below). We put him on his stomach to piss him off and develop some neck/back muscles every now and then when he's not full of my wife's liquid gold. I sing to him (I'm a vocalist/amateur musician sort of) when I'm doing the war crime of changing or swaddling (I roll tight burritos) but that's about it. Mild case of jaundice but rebounded hard after we started pumping/bottle feeding. Most likely related to not getting enough food. See *
I come from a moderately high performing family (doctors/stem professionals and such) so theres a lot of pressure to make sure this kid isnt a dipshit. I'm playing all kinds of music while he sleeps (doesn't seem to be affected by noise while sleeping) but I can't teach the kid math until he at least understands object permanence right? I also feel like all that classical music Montessori stuff isbcomplete horseshit and I'm much more concerned with just making sure the kid is a good person but I also want onto pull the right levers and flip the right switches where I can.
The bottom line is: Am I doing it wrong or is this it for a while until he can stay awake while changed and fed? Is it normal? I feel like I'm just drugging a child to sleep. Looking for any input. Thanks.
Also, if there's any words of wisdom for my anxious wife (see *) that would be helpful. She's struggling with the whole breast feeding issue even though she's creating a massive surplus at day 7 and we've only supplemented with formula for 3 feeds total. I'm super proud of her for pushing through cracked sensitive nips and I'm stoked that this kid is getting anything natural but she feels like a failure for not direct feeding which i guess i understand is "ideal" but shes killing it pumping. My reassurances don't seem to comfort her unfortunately
*Kid falls asleep 1min after he latches without fail and my wife is super anxious about not breast feeding but she pumps out a surplus of milk. He wasnt getting enough sustenance after birth but he's ravenous on the bottle. 2-4 oz every feed maybe 2.50z average.
Edit: my biggest gripe is that I'm killing 24/7 and this kid has literally no sense of humor. I was hoping for paternal instinct but all I got was killer dad jokes.
I dont have kids yet, but i do remember this Stage from my much younger siblings. Its sleeping, drinking, bellyache, pooping in a loop. Funnfact: in the beginning their eyes also only focus on about 30cm (which is about the distance of mums face when breast feeding).
There is not much that you can teach here. Still, i think that the music he hears influences his taste of music later. Dont think it will already help with math and so, but it creates memories and melodies connected to memories touch you somehow even far later. This is just my thought not scientific evidence.
Being fed and loved are the only things that matter. If you want a Mozart, Start with Instruments at age 3.
For the breast feeding.what i hear from my friends with kids It is very normal to have difficulties in the beginning. ASK other women around that already have kids for tips. If the nips hurt there is all kind of stuff like putting tea bags on it (dont remember which tea but a friend did it), silver caps are said to do wonders, cooling pads etc. Some women cannot breastfeed at all, for some it starts later, for some it gets better every week. alll of this is normal its just one of the topics no one speaks about because its "embarrassing if you dont perform". So stupid. We should all speak about it. We do it among my friends and it is very helpful. Also If you think of it, its quite demanding for the breasts to just make the exact right amount of milk From the day the baby is born. Not before. Not knowing how much this baby drinks which also varies. And Especially since giving birth and producing milk both are super exhausting for the body. With me, my mum had far too much milk. She was overproducing. After some time it normalized. Its totally OK if its the other way round.
Have fun. :)