this post was submitted on 15 Sep 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] kelpie_returns@lemmy.world 55 points 2 weeks ago (19 children)

People of the penile persuasion can sit while peeing. It is very easy to do.

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago (12 children)
[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 40 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Why do you have morning wood at a public toilet

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 34 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I cannot believe my morning erections are being judged by trash girlfriend.

[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I am literally trash girlfriend and Ive never had morning wood at a public toilet

I feel like if I judge you its gotta be a good reason at that point

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

One day you will go to a public toilet to realize you have morning wood, then you will understand the struggle.

[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Waking up in a public toilet does sound fun but since Ive taken estrogen I dont ger morning wood often

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (2 children)

so you saying the real solution for peeing with morning wood is estrogen?

i would transition but there's no ikea near me for the mandatory Blahaj.

[–] SuDmit@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Did you mean... You wood transition?

I guess wood is inescapable

[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You can order both the blahaj and the estrogen online

[–] IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I guess I'm trans now, hopefully there are no social/political consequences for being trans in this precise moment in history in the United States.

[–] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I'm now on the side that everyone needs to sit down to pee. but as a compromise, everyone is allowed to go number 2 standing up

[–] benderbeerman@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If we could simply choose when we got erections, high school would have been much less awkward

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[–] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

how the fuck do you piss with wood anyways? just wait 5 minutes

[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Proceeds to pee like the guy in Upload

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[–] empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

brother if you got wood how tf are you peeing sitting down. That shit pointing up

[–] rumschlumpel@feddit.org 10 points 1 week ago (3 children)

If it's pointing up, how the fuck you hit the bowl standing up?

[–] benderbeerman@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You step back real far and lean forward, stabilize with your hand on the tank. It might take a lil practice but it's light years better than trying to bend it down

[–] Sadbutdru@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 week ago

You can lean forward even better starting from a sitting position, chest down, hips up with slight rotation.

Leaning and hoping your hand doesn't go through the drywall. Luckily for me by the time I gained weight I didn't have the morning issues all the time.

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[–] spikespaz@programming.dev 6 points 1 week ago (2 children)

It comes with the risk of contamination or infection if you're well endowed.

[–] BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I'm not well endowed, at best I'm average... at best. But while I don't touch the water, I hit the front of the bowl. It's disgusting to feel the cold porcelain.

[–] juliebean@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 week ago (2 children)

do such people also have to poop while standing?

[–] Sadbutdru@sopuli.xyz 5 points 1 week ago

No they just sling it round their neck for that.

[–] spikespaz@programming.dev 2 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Analyze the form factor of toilet. Is it one of those round ones that's sized for potty-training a child? Emergencies only. The bowl deep enough and water low enough? Push dick down with one hand, hope Poseidon doesn't kiss your willy. Stand up far to wipe, don't sit down too fast. Try not to piss under the seat.

Prefer to avoid public restrooms for shits, stand up to pee.

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[–] sentient_loom@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] CompactFlax@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 2 weeks ago

Because splashback.

[–] GissaMittJobb@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 week ago (2 children)
  • Cleaner for your penis: sitting down eliminates the last drops remaining that are common when standing up
  • Cleaner for the bathroom: zero risk foreskin messing up your aim and having pee hit areas that don't get washed by the flush
  • Better urine elimination for men that have prostate issues or lower urinary tract symptoms. I don't, but it's a factor
  • More chill to sit down and check your phone while in the bathroom
[–] LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Wait, are you dragging your schlong against the inside of the toilet so it gets in contact with the water that runs down it?

[–] GissaMittJobb@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 week ago

No, I'm talking about where the urine hits the toilet. If it hits a part that doesn't get washed by the flush, the urine dries out there and smells.

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