this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2026
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Do teleported urine and feces leave vacuum behind? Because that would mean massive cavitation bubbles in both the bladder and the rectum, immediately collapsing with a loud bang and a momentary increase in temperature over 100°C. Plus the organ walls experiencing sudden huge acceleration, either shaking the fuck out of other pelvic organs, or straight up ripping. (Must be fun being between the bladder and the rectum at that moment, and the anus is gonna pucker like it never puckered before.)
The alternative is replacing the feces and urine with something of equal volume and pressure, which most probably means either compressed air or water. This would leave you either with water in your bladder and rectum, or large amount of air in your bladder and rectum, which both are of dubious utility and ill advisement.
The transported feces is replaced with whatever the crewmember desires. In Picard's case, Tea Earl Grey Hot! Riker gets a vibrator. Troi, a particular mix of heroin and qualuudes.
Classy and tasty enema.
maybe instead of teleporting out the entire contents of a full rectum, you teleport a ml at a time, or basically teleport every tiny bit as it enters the rectum, same with the bladder.
Honestly, teleporter tech is criminally underused in that universe.
can you teleport out co2 from the alveoli and replace with oxygen instead of needing a respirator? imagine 99% of surgeries could be done with teleport tech instead of needing to cut anything.
fuck, maybe that is how Hypospray works, and how it can inject drugs into the bloodstream without hurting the skin or the clothes they are wearing.
There is also the transporter buffer, they can put a lot of stuff in the buffer, why not use it for storage? Or maybe a brig?
One of the Abrahams movie casually made spaceships obsolete by having teleporters that can reach across the galaxy.
And those are ideas that I came up in a couple minutes of thinking.
I've just thought of another consequence: if the waste is always teleported out, then the muscles of the bladder and the rectum are gonna become dystrophic, while the anal sphincter forgets how to loosen. In addition, the urinary tract might dry out for want of any moisture from the bladder.
Now imagine that one day your trusty crap teleporter breaks down. You're stuck with piss and shit filling the bladder and the rectum, while both outlets are plugged from years of disuse and you don't know anymore how to push the stuff out.
it wouldn't just happen to you. but to everyone in the ship. they have to fix it before they start wretching in pain.
Indeed. Wait, did you forget that your ship is a minuscule trade boat, and the whole crew is you and another guy, with none of you being specialists in teleporter repair?
Your bladder and rectum lost their elasticity and volume long ago due to never being filled more than a bit.
You're still a day away from your destination.
horror survival story