this post was submitted on 17 May 2026
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Autism
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The real way to handle this? The main task has 27 sub steps ok... Look at sub step 1 and ignore the other 26. Let's say this is getting required materials for a project. This may have 10 sub sub steps, pick the first ignore the other 9. This first one is making a list of what you need. Keep this generic, say you're building a shelf, add screws to your material list, don't worry about exact size or type, that's later just screws. And you need wood and you need wood stain. Now you completed the first task. Second task is determine wood type, oak? Maple? Mdf? Plywood? That was easy number 2 done. Now you have 2 tasks done and are on a roll so it's easier to start working on step 3(say determining length of shelf).
Doing small steps increases confidence and encourages further progress. It's not the total number of steps, it's showing yourself you did some so you can likely do the next small task.
Like washing dishes, an overflowing sink is intimidating but if you wash a bowl a plate shouldn't be much more work and then you see a fork well that's easy and a spoon also easy... Now the sink is half empty and wouldn't it be nice to just have an empty sink?
[Tone: light hearted joke, not a personal attack or seriously questioning you.]
Are you even autistic, bro?
[ This reminds me of getting yelled at while at work because I get stuck on the details ๐ฅฒ ]
If I am, it's incredibly mild. Mostly read this community because my son has extreme autism. He is 13, only says 1-3 word sentences, can't use the bathroom by himself (can go to bathroom and use toilet but can't put his underwear back on), watches TV way below his age bracket(blues clue, known as "blue" and team umizoomi, known as "bot") etc.
Anyways, size and type of screws would be important decisions to make, for example if mounting shelf to dry wall you wouldn't want an ultra fine threading on the screw. But it's not important in the first step. There's a good chance you actually need/want several types of screws. But the first step is meant to be quick and easy to give you the feeling of atleast doing something instead of paralyzed by the complexity of the whole task.
I'm sorry if my comment was hurtful, I was trying to be light hearted in the spirit of the meme.
The point I was trying to make is that just because something is illogical and even if we know it's illogical, doesn't mean we can just stop, ya know?
It wasn't hurtful at all. I was just trying to explain that I'm not really autistic but have a connection to the autistic community.
If you break a task into many subtasks but still can't complete it because you get too stuck on the details, maybe this coping strategy isn't for you. You can either work on this issue(maybe with a professional or maybe self-practice) or find another strategy which works for you. Like some people release stress by sitting silently and concentrating on their breathing. This just makes me more stressed because my mind searches for more things to think about, probably why I need sounds and voices to sleep(pointless stream on conscious talk is like benedryl to me) . Not saying silent meditating doesn't help people, it's just not the solution for me.
Also be careful how much you break stuff into steps... I said make a list. I didn't say ok now you need to get a pen. Ok to get a pen you need stand up. We'll to stand up you push against your chair and extend your legs etc.
When you have chronic fatigue, oftentimes pushing against your chair and extending your legs to get up is the most difficult step. I think in general you should stop breaking things down into steps as soon as the first one seems doable.
Yeah that's probably a good rule of thumb. My point was with the number of sub tasks op stated they had were probably either broken up to much or the task was way too big. Like if you have chronic fatigue and standing up is a struggle your goal should not be build a colony on venus. Maybe set a goal for running a marathon. Hell maybe just set a goal to take a shower every day this week.
But I like your idea of when you think you can reasonably complete that goal stop breaking it up into further steps.