this post was submitted on 27 May 2026
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Joi AI is hiring 10 “masturbation consultants” to test its AI-guided masturbation feature and report how it affects stress, sleep, mood, and confidence.

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[–] programmer_belch@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

We are proud to announce our AI pleasure cube. following AI JOI practices chosen by you, it offers the best sensory overload in the market. It even comes in two colors for optimal gooning experience, ivory white and slick black. Our data analysts confirm that the serotonin increase is three times better than current ASMR technology*.

Buy now and get one month subscription to VRape, the best virtual reality experience.

* ~This device is more addictive than heroin, its withdrawal can cause mental anguish, ego death and meeting the hat man. Please consult with your primary care provider~

[–] OpenStars@piefed.social 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I want to know more about meeting this hat man, how does that work?

For a friend.

[–] BarrelAgedBoredom@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 day ago

Eat a handful of benadry, you'll meet the hat man and his shadow buddies