this post was submitted on 09 Jun 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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people have been demonizing it for most of the AD years i think but it's quite pleasant really. are there any proven negative effects?

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[–] echo@lemmings.world 238 points 5 months ago (2 children)
[–] andrewrgross@slrpnk.net 104 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (12 children)

I'd like to go a bit deeper.

I don't think people invented socially controlling practices because they found religion, I think they found religion to frame the invention of socially controlling practices.

Masturbation is a gratifying act that relives pressure to settle into a rigid domestic arrangement that serves to make more workers and soldiers, and create dependents that need fed, and whose well-being would be threatened if a parent became defiant and provoked the ire of elites.

Masturbation is good for the individual at the expense of the nation and its rulers. So it's inevitable that priests would decry it as an affront against god, as that's historically been their purpose.

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 59 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I'd like to go a bit deeper.

go on...

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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[–] Stupidmanager@lemmy.world 20 points 5 months ago (6 children)

Pretty sad when religion claims to abhor evil, happens to be the source of a lot of it. Right? I can’t name a single thing religion ever did for me other than make me miserable.

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[–] alekwithak@lemmy.world 129 points 5 months ago (5 children)

Christianity and capitalism. If it doesn't make you feel guilty the Christians don't like it and if you can provide it to yourself for free the capitalists don't like it.

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[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 128 points 5 months ago (2 children)

So, like, for the bulk of history, the people demonizing it are religious assholes.

They demonized sex out of wedlock, demonized wanking off; and any other kind of sexual release, while simultaneously deciding who you can marry (and therefore have kids with,).

It’s one of their core methods of social control, ensuring wealth is only passed on to children of wealthy and “faithful” families.

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[–] snek_boi@lemmy.ml 108 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (34 children)

Masturbation is totally normal and healthy, and you're spot on that it shouldn't be demonized or shamed. In men, it might even reduce the risk of prostate cancer.

At the same time, it's important to have a balanced and psychologically flexible relationship with masturbation and sexuality. As psychologist Steven Hayes, a leading expert on psychological flexibility, explains: getting too fixated on any one activity or coping mechanism, even a healthy one, can lead to psychological inflexibility if it is used to avoid experiencing your life fully (For a thorough explanation of how this works, feel free to check out A Liberated Mind by Steven Hayes). Psychological inflexibility here means getting stuck in rigid behavior patterns to the point that it messes with living a full and meaningful life.

So while I'm totally with you that masturbation is healthy and that bullshit social taboos against it should be rejected, it's also good to be mindful about your motivation behind doing it. Are you doing it because you're escaping pain? Or are you doing it because it aligns with your values and makes your life meaningful? If you rely on masturbation too much and don't have ways of accepting your emotions and connecting with the world, it could potentially tip into unhelpful psychological rigidity and a frustrating life. The key is to be able to experience masturbation while still staying flexible enough to show up fully for the rest of your life too.

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[–] boletus@sh.itjust.works 79 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Jerking it is fine, but just like any coping mechanism, you can abuse it and get addicted to it, then it becomes a problem.

If you're doomscrolling porn, for example, then maybe it is having a negative effect on you.

[–] Infinite@lemmy.zip 28 points 5 months ago (3 children)

Boobscrolling. Poonscrolling? Goonscrolling!

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[–] BastingChemina@slrpnk.net 75 points 5 months ago (9 children)

Ejaculation lower the risk of prostate cancer, so masturbation should probably be medically advised to all men.

4-7 times a week is a good number according this study

[–] JohnOliver@feddit.dk 37 points 5 months ago (5 children)

Oh... there's an upper limit? Is 4 times a day not healthy then?

[–] BastingChemina@slrpnk.net 31 points 5 months ago (1 children)

At least 4-7 times a week. I have not read anything about an upper limit so go for it.

[–] JohnOliver@feddit.dk 32 points 5 months ago

Im going to live for ever!

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[–] frezik@midwest.social 66 points 5 months ago (6 children)

Because you enjoy it. If you're fixing your issues, it must be through pain and suffering. If it doesn't involve pain and suffering, then it isn't fixing your issues. The "Protestant work ethic" doesn't come right out and say that, but it's the implication.

See also: denial of LSD and psilocybin for mental health purposes.

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[–] kent_eh@lemmy.ca 61 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (3 children)

(Sing along with me)

Every sperm is sacred

Every sperm is good

Every sperm is wanted

In your neighborhood

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 39 points 5 months ago (6 children)

Remind me to never walk barefoot in your neighborhood.

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[–] tunetardis@lemmy.ca 54 points 5 months ago

literally good for you

I actually asked my family doctor at one point about the health effects of masturbation. She said that as a guy, if you are not otherwise sexually active, it's good for the prostate to keep the plumbing working down there.

[–] EveryMuffinIsNowEncrypted@lemmy.blahaj.zone 54 points 5 months ago (3 children)
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[–] boonhet@lemm.ee 45 points 5 months ago (4 children)

Religion, capitalism. Powerful groups want more people to have more children.

Luckily I'm in a progressive enough country that even in school we were taught that masturbation is a thing and not necessarily bad.

As for negative effects - if you do it TOO much, particularly with a very strong grip, then don't be surprised if, when having actual intercourse, you're just not feeling much and might be unable to reach orgasm. You might even be uninterested in your partner sexually. A few days without masturbation will fix it though, doesn't seem to be permanent. Day 2 without doing it and I couldn't keep my eyes (or hands) off my wife's body.

Sex was very infrequent for me and my wife in the last few months of her pregnancy, so that's how I know. Soon as we started doing it on a somewhat regular basis again, I opted to quit jerking it because I wanted to enjoy the real thing more, even if it's not every single day. No long-term negative effects that I've noticed.

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[–] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 39 points 5 months ago

A lot of religion has been to push a heterosexual couple together for the means of procreation. Masturbation has been seen as a way for people to lessen their urge to procreate in the appropriate canonical manner.

[–] Modern_medicine_isnt@lemmy.world 35 points 5 months ago

These days mutual masterbation is better for your relationship than having kids. It's not the kids fault, society has made having kids a nightmare.

And of course the reason it is demonized is that any powerfull organization/society needs peoples shoulder to stand on. So, the more people, the more power. And they don't really care if it was by rape due to sexual frustration, they just need more people to take advantage of.

[–] SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 32 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago) (2 children)

Because easy dopamine hits are also easy to gain unhealthy addictions to. Because it's literally right there, easily accessible, at all times.

Couple this with how incredibly unhealthy the social relationships portrayed in most pornography are, and you're gearing up for a lot of young men addicted to wanking and having unrealistic expectations of sex. The porn young women read isn't necessarily much better, in the regard of healthy social sexual relationships.

Now, I'm not one of those weird "you shouldn't jerk it at all" folks because that's just extremism in the other direction.

Temperance and moderation are key in all things.

[–] Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone 33 points 5 months ago (14 children)

Porn “addiction” is a misnomer because it doesn’t have much in common with drug addiction, gambling addiction, etc. Porn “addicts”, when you show them images of porn, do not have brain responses like those of addicts who are shown images of whatever they’re addicted to.

But what is a great predictor for whether or not someone will self report being a porn addict is shame. Gay men in particular are significantly more likely than straight men in general to say they’re addicted to porn. So are straight men with a heavily religious background.

Which isn’t to say that people who report porn addictions aren’t really suffering, it’s just not the same as an actual addiction and is instead the result of living in a culture telling you that your normal sexual desires are wrong.

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[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 26 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Probably to sell more Corn Flakes.

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[–] Muscar@discuss.online 23 points 5 months ago (8 children)

You realize things aren't viewed the same all over the world right? Here in Sweden it's nothing bad or wrong, we generally have good sex education and parents that are fine with it as long as we keep it private and clean. And as adults it's completely normal, not that uncommon to talk about either. There was a monthly magazine for teens when I grew up that talked a lot about sex, sexual identity and stuff like that and the readers could send it questions to get answered by professionals or other readers. Very open and helped so many with things they didn't dare ask parents or others about and it was always a better source than the Internet when that came around. Pretty sure it's still a thing too.

So it's just seen as a thing everyone does and enjoys.

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 20 points 5 months ago

because suffering is fetishized

[–] InternetUser2012@midwest.social 20 points 5 months ago

Religion that's why. They have to control you.

[–] h3mlocke@lemm.ee 15 points 5 months ago

Tbh, I've tried it. It was pleasant.

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