this post was submitted on 30 Oct 2024
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TenForward: Where Every Vulcan Knows Your Name

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Some of the many species Jeffrey Combs has evolved into:

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[–] ShaunaTheDead@fedia.io 158 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Women, don't marry men who won't take your name. That's a wall of separation he wants to keep between you. It won't be the only one.

[–] TheLowestStone@lemmy.world 56 points 1 month ago (5 children)

I took my wife's name when we got married. I hate my family and intended to change my last name anyway. Her family is awesome. It was an easy choice.

[–] Psythik@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago

I plan on doing the same. My dad Americanized my family's last name, and because my girlfriend is the same ethnicity as him, I plan on taking her name to undo the damage and go back to my roots.

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[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 36 points 1 month ago

And don't marry a man who insists you take his. That's a wall of control he's building around you and he won't stop until he's separated you from everyone and everything you love. Marry the man who accepts it's your choice to decide, along with every other decision about yourself.

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[–] BenVimes@lemmy.ca 89 points 1 month ago (4 children)

There are lots of reasons for women to keep their maiden name. In the case of my wife, she had two good ones:

  1. She didn't want to become disassociated from her scientific publications.

  2. She didn't want to complicate or redo any immigration paperwork.

[–] Sylvartas@lemmy.world 23 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Also some names just sound better. And some names go better than others with some surnames

[–] pineapplelover@lemm.ee 26 points 1 month ago (2 children)
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[–] rhombus@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 month ago

My wife just didn’t want to change hers, so I changed mine instead. No need for a particular reason.

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[–] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 51 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It's heart warming to see Jeffrey Combs is an incredible actor with good taste in the company he keeps. It's exciting seeing him vocally shouting down the fascists.

[–] EmpathicVagrant@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I read the comment in his slimy “Brunt- FCA” tone the way he addresses Quark. I loved him already but seeing this just makes him so much more respectable and admirable.

Heartwarming is a lovely way to put it.

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[–] BradleyUffner@lemmy.world 37 points 1 month ago (4 children)

My fiance and I are considering creating a brand new last name that we both take.

[–] mipadaitu@lemmy.world 26 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Hot tip, change HIS last name prior to the wedding and she gets the name change free.

I know a couple that waited until after the wedding to do that and the husband changed his name, then the wife was given the option of keeping her old name, or switch to his old name.

She ended up having to go through the entire name change process without the benefit of the auto-name flip from the marriage.

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[–] sdfric88@lemmy.sdf.org 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)
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[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I've known other people who do that.

I just feel like any name change that you don't need (i.e. you're transitioning) is just more bother than it's worth.

[–] BradleyUffner@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Yeah, that's what we are running into. The marriage forms here in NC make it simple to take the husband's last name as part of the process, but any other kind of change requires a lot of crazy, expensive, and time consuming steps.

[–] itsprobablyfine@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 month ago

I wonder if there's an opening there to claim discrimination on the basis of sex.

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[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 33 points 1 month ago

I think it’s safe to say that Walsh knows a lot about women maintaining “walls of separation”. Maybe even restraining orders.

[–] Psythik@lemmy.world 29 points 1 month ago (9 children)

It's fiancée. Fiancé is male.

[–] thatsTheCatch@lemmy.nz 21 points 1 month ago

Today I Learned! I had no idea there was a difference. Apparently they are pronounced the same, it's only a written difference.

But it seems like in English fiancé is becoming a gender neutral term

Dictionary.com — Fiancé vs Fiancée

[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

So is it a red flag, then, that my husband did not take my last name? And if it's a gay couple, which one is complaining?

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[–] Bougie_Birdie@lemmy.blahaj.zone 25 points 1 month ago (3 children)

You don't expect Herbert West: Reanimator to be the voice of reason... yet here we are

What a funky timeline

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I actually had the pleasure of working with him on a motion comic project once (which sadly never got finished) and this is 100% him. He's a very cool guy in person and this is exactly the sort of thing I would have expected him to say, although maybe not directly to Matt Walsh.

He's also a massive Radiohead fan. I'm not, so I mostly just sat there and listened when he gushed about them at lunch after hearing them on the radio in my car. Thankfully, the other people with us knew more about Radiohead than I did.

He also said one of the funniest things I've heard a pro like him say in a work setting, talking about a movie role he was offered: "I'll do it for $1000, but not if the script is shit."

[–] Bougie_Birdie@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That last bit sounds like him. That's how you end up with the fun roles, like the talking mould that grows on somebody's toilet.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

That last bit sounds like him.

That's what made it so funny. He'll do pretty much anything if he likes the idea. Just pay him scale and he's up for it. But don't offer him $1000 and expect him to do magic with your terrible screenplay.

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[–] Blackmist@feddit.uk 21 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Yet another conservative weakchin hiding behind a beard.

They're certainly going for a look right now.

[–] rustydrd@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

It's the "hardworking man" archetype that they all like to impersonate.

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[–] elliot_crane@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

As a bearded lumberjack-lookin’ MF who isn’t a conservative or a weakchin, these dudes can fuck right off. We do not claim them.

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[–] wjrii@lemmy.world 20 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (7 children)

My wife went double-barreled after I specifically told her I didn't care if she changed, kept, or anything in between. I didn't want to change my name, so why should she have to?

Twenty years next summer.

Edit: "double-barreled" just means hyphenated.

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[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 20 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Who cares what name anyone uses .... my wife and I never got married and she's always had her name and we never bothered changing a thing because we never cared. No one cares ... not even the government.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

my wife and I never got married

I'm assuming you mean you never had a ceremony?

Aren't you automatically married by common law in Canada after a certain number of years? I seem to remember that was the case with my uncle and his wife. But he eventually had to marry her because she's German and she couldn't get a long-term visa so he could work in the states when he was allowed to return. He dodged the Vietnam war draft. When Clinton allowed people like him to return, he got a job at the Library of Congress. Quite ironic.

Meanwhile, she continued to get paid for Canadian work because she was a professor at the (at the time) by-mail only Athabasca University.

If Uncle Sam was expecting them to stick around, they didn't. They moved back to Saskatoon after he retired. Canada treated him very well. He happened to be pursuing a folklore degree right at the time the Canadian government realized they needed folklorists to help preserve various cultures within their borders.

Sorry for rambling. I need more sleep apparently.

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 16 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Yes ... that's why I say the government doesn't care ... after a couple have been together for a few years, they are more or less considered married, legally speaking. We thought of a ceremony for a while ... then waited for so long that we just never think of it any more.

I know some same sex couples that have been together for over 30 years up here, they got together years ago as 'friends living together' when the attitudes of same sex couples were still frowned upon. Now after all that time, they are more or less married couples and file their taxes just like every other married couple. When it comes to finances and taxation, governments and economics really don't care about sexuality or sexual orientation, as long as you pay your taxes.

I also know of a friend of a friend from the sixties who lived up north near Timmins who received US draft dodgers during the 70s. A couple of young professionals who eventually became high school teachers and college professors and ended up just living up here all their lives. They did a lot for people and gave a lot of their energy and expertise to people up here ... also excellent folk musicians and artists ... all because of some dumb war they were avoiding. There was some good that came out of those dumb wars the US was forcing their young people to die in for no reason.

Don't worry about rambling ... I always enjoy hearing from you.

Get more sleep ... never apologize for being a Ramblin' Man. Stay well my friend.

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[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago

You can't expect a regressive to understand evolution. They are going backward faster than the rest of us are moving forward.

[–] Pickle_Jr@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 1 month ago (7 children)

There are tons of reasons why one might not want to change their name. At a minimum you have to send a form to the state, update any licenses you have, contact your banks, your insurance, your place of work... Best case scenario it's an annoying hassle to deal with.

Was I appreciative when my wife took my name? Sure. But that's mostly because we also share the same first name so it's hilarious to share the same last name. But I told her many times before we got married she didn't need to do it. I never expected that out of her.

If having a matching name is a big deal with you, then you can change your name.

[–] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 month ago

If having a matching name is a big deal with you, then you can change your name.

'Why should I have to change? He's the one who sucks!' -Michael Bolton

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[–] dumbass@leminal.space 16 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I read this in Shrans voice.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 20 points 1 month ago

It probably even works in Brunt's voice, because Ferengi are more progressive than Matt Walsh.

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[–] ThePantser@lemmy.world 16 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I prefer the old ways. Steve son of Bill 5th generation Help Desk support.

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[–] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Marrying Jeffery Combs is like marrying 300 men at the same time, though. Every day he can just act like a different alien.

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 11 points 1 month ago

" I don't know who you are anymore!
I love it!"

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

For someone who gives this much of a shit about gender roles, you'd think they'd learn the correct forms of the word for an intended spouse.

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[–] GeminiFrenchFry@lemm.ee 14 points 1 month ago

I almost kept my maiden, but now it's an additional middle name. I love my maiden name, but I changed my name to my husbo's because it has a Z in it and I was super stoked to have a Z in my signature. 😂I also like the way it sounds with my first name.

Sometimes, it's really that simple. My husband didn't care either way when we discussed it. It was just a choice I made.

[–] idiomaddict@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (9 children)

My maiden name was awful to have. Other people liked it because it looked cool, but it was a hassle for everything even in the US, where at least part of it was well known. I then moved to Germany, where it was just totally foreign.

My married name is under three syllables (vs more than eight), easy to spell, and sounds as German as possible. My husband would have loved to take my last name, but we couldn’t do it the way we wanted to (German naming laws 🙃). I would really have liked to at least have been able to keep my maiden name as a middle name, but alas.

I still feel very weird (about a year out) about it, but there are way more good feelings than bad.

However, it’s really annoying that people now assume I’m German. I put in a shit load of work to learn German well as an adult, and my strongest skill is in pronunciation. That combined with my name means people think I’m just a native German who’s bad at grammar, and they don’t correct me anymore.

I always wanted to blend in as a native, I just didn’t think about the middle stretch where I just seem a bit dumb to others, both because of the language and cultural things that people now expect me to know (I thought it was called handkäse because you can eat the little rounds straight from the hand, no need for bread, until last year).

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[–] TheGrandNagus@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

My wife took my name, but I would not give the slightest shit if she didn't, which I made clear to her at the time.

We briefly discussed having a double-barrel surname, but writing that out would be a mild inconvenience that neither of us want.

And maybe this is a dumb question, but what happens when forename surnameA-surnameB marries or has children with forename surnameX-surnameY?

What is the resulting name? forename surnameA-surnameB-surnameX-surnameY? Do they pick one of each, e.g. A-X?

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[–] Kaput@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (5 children)

It's illegal to change your name for wedding reason in Quebec (Canada). Something that followed the quiet Revolution and distancing government and religion. You don't own your wife. You can still pee on her shoes but it won't be notarized.

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[–] Mango@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago (7 children)

What the fuck makes my name any better than hers? Fuck my name. I don't even want it.

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[–] lurklurk@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

The compromise is clearly to swap last names with each other

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[–] S_H_K@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 month ago (4 children)

What a narrow view. In other many places things are different and they function you know. In Brazil kids get the mother's surname.

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