this post was submitted on 22 Sep 2025
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Science Memes

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[–] fahfahfahfah@lemmy.billiam.net 382 points 1 week ago (3 children)

FWIW, she was cleared and her ex-wife charged with making false statements.

[–] TeamAssimilation@infosec.pub 174 points 1 week ago (7 children)

This shouldn’t be omitted from the meme. Astronauts are some of the most level-minded people in this world, given the risks they face every moment.

I don’t think jealousy or insecurity would be a common occurrence given how busy they are.

[–] TheBannedLemming@lemmy.world 46 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Actually, there was a high profile and notorious case of a female NASA astronaut and Naval officer named Lisa Nowak, who was placed on trail and convicted of felony burglary and misdemeanor assault charges. This all stemmed from an affair she was having with a fellow astronaut named Bill Oefelein, who both of them were married to different people at the time.

When Bill decided to call the affair off and started to see another woman, an Air Force Captain named Colleen Shipman. Lisa had an emotional breakdown and after her own marriage had failed. Planned on possibly kidnapping Colleen. She was eventually arrested at Orlando International Airport that she had followed Colleen to. Besides the criminal convictions listed above, she was dismissed from NASA and demoted in rank and forcibly retired from the Navy.

[–] TeamAssimilation@infosec.pub 23 points 1 week ago

I don’t know man, this seems like an obvious case of alien body snatching. They just never learned to act like regular humans.

[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Don't forget about the part where she wore a diaper while driving so she wouldn't have to make any pit stops.

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[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 30 points 1 week ago (1 children)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lisa_Nowak

There are exceptions to the whole level minded thing.

[–] M0oP0o@mander.xyz 26 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I know this is the poop drive without even opening the link.

Among other things.

[–] BetaBlake@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Putting those diapers to good use

[–] M0oP0o@mander.xyz 6 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Well she says she did not use them (I guess just shitting in place)

"She drove her husband's car 900 miles (1,400 km) from Houston, Texas, to Orlando, Florida, to confront Shipman. Early police reports stated that she wore Maximum Absorbency Garments during the trip, but she later denied this."

From Wikipedia, but it must be noted the trip was made by herself in such a short time that poop had to happen.

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[–] RamenJunkie@midwest.social 7 points 1 week ago

Yeah but what the hell am I supposed to do woth this novel drsft Lesbian Space Criminal Lovers now?

Why was I not told sooner the story was a lie???

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[–] Carl@hexbear.net 42 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

"lesbians are accused in 100% of space crimes" is a much less fun statistic.

[–] principalkohoutek@hexbear.net 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Lesbians continue to flaunt their spotless space criminal record

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[–] NeatNit@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 1 week ago

The original statement is still vacuously true so your can keep saying it :D

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[–] rockerface@lemmy.cafe 76 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space Identity Theft doesn't quite have the same ring to it

[–] blackbrook@mander.xyz 39 points 1 week ago (3 children)
[–] kersploosh@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Headlining this Friday night! With special guest Gay Zombie Super Soldiers! $10 at the door, 21 and up, doors open at 8pm.

[–] lugal@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 1 week ago

"Falgsith" for short

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[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Wait when did it change from laser to luxury I missed the update

[–] rockerface@lemmy.cafe 7 points 1 week ago

Welcome to the future, old man

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 42 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Your Honor, with all due respect, my client can only be put on trial by a space judge and a jury of her space peers

[–] booty@hexbear.net 11 points 1 week ago (3 children)

A jury of astronauts would be kind of fun if it were possible for them not to know each other already, but I don't think that's possible with the current number of astronauts

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[–] TomMasz@piefed.social 32 points 1 week ago (5 children)

Is ISS network traffic monitored? Because if it is, this was a really dumb crime.

[–] CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social 65 points 1 week ago (1 children)

To my understanding, she wasn't determined to have actually committed it, just was accused

[–] Cort@lemmy.world 36 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Yup:

The claims were later found to be false, and McClain was cleared.[28] On April 7, 2020, Worden was indicted on two charges of making false statements.

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[–] jrubal1462@mander.xyz 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Please tell me this entire thing wasn't an elaborate add for NordVPN.

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[–] mkwt@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago

It's probably fully recorded. Everything in and out.

That way if there's a mishap it's possible to go back and reconstruct the entire sequence or to replay high fidelity simulations of the network traffic at the equipment to reproduce problems.

Probably safe to assume that it is.

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[–] sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone 25 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I thought some of the Apollo astronauts were illegally enriching themselves by selling a service where they would take people's stuff to the moon in their private gear allowance, and then give it back.

The Apollo 15 crew got in trouble for something like that, postage stamps I think.

[–] BCBoy911@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 week ago

Smuggling moon rocks back to Earth to be sold on the black market is also pretty lucrative iirc.

[–] DagwoodIII@piefed.social 24 points 1 week ago (3 children)
[–] roguetrick@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah but she wasn't in space just had a space diaper.

[–] jonne@infosec.pub 6 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Distinction without a difference. If you're wearing the space diaper you're basically experiencing everything there is to experience about space.

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[–] Xanthrax@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (5 children)

Didn't someone already commit theft in space?

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 23 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] don@lemmy.ca 13 points 1 week ago

username checks out

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[–] lvnelrs@programming.dev 9 points 1 week ago

smash the patriachy by being the first criminal in space.

Bringing "Be Gay Do Crime" to another level

[–] uss_entrepreneur@startrek.website 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Is space international waters? Does anything go?

[–] UnmetPlayer@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Ships in intl waters are still governed by the laws of their flag state. I don't see why this wouldn't also apply to the ISS as a US-flagged vessel

Edit: I assume the modules are flagged differently. I imagine Zvezda and the Soyuz's are flagged Russian, etc. or maybe the ISS is jointly flagged under US and Russian laws at the same time. Or the laws of the citizens home country is applied individually or something.

Are you saying that the simpsons lied to me?

[–] locahosr443@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

Lesbians... Those bitches be (statistically) crazy

Someone with musical talent, please start a band and name it "Lesbian Space Crimes" 😆

[–] don@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)
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