Asklemmy

I'm sponsored by Big Gay to promote liking cocks. They have a good health plan which includes free prostate exams. The PTO is a bit underwhelming tho; they really expect you to push cockliking 24/7, 365. It's hard

Wait, you all get paid?!

My recruiter told me this was entirely a volunteer position.

The sorosbucks seem to be drying up lately. All these abortions aren’t going to pay for themselves, I might have to go paint a few crosswalks with rainbows to make up the difference

Ben & Jerries. I'm not a real believer though, I'm only in it for the compensation in product. Tubs and tubs of ice cream.

I work in the warehouse for Antifa Co. Hillary Clinton and Obama sign my checks!

Currently trying to get funded by the shadow furry communist catgirl government

I'm paid by to post inflammatory shit to make leftists look bad, but everyone here loves what I have to say

I'm currently freelance antifa, the gig work pays better

The penguin communist party.

I'm being funded by penguins. I don't know why, I don't even like mackerel that much but these fuckers swam from Antarctica, up the Mississippi, up a few tributaries, to deliver more fish than I know what to do with. So I can't tell them to fuck off and that I already am on their side. That'd just be mean. So anyways, anybody want some fish?

Currently I get my salary indirectly from the International Practical Chemtrail Cabal (IPCC), with the social media PR side more as a side hustle.

The support of viewers like you

The USSR shadow government. The collapse of the USSR was a false flag and the real USSR has been in charge behind the scenes the whole time.

Marijuana

MY small housing org mostly has bake sales at art markets and makes eyes when we explain our work in hopes of an added donation.

I'm currently crowd funded, but I've been thinking about seeing if Blue Cross Blue Shield wants to fund me

I’m funded by Big Small, the lobbying group for those people who sell hand made crafts on the sidewalk.

Big Gay Tech

I'm actually funding the shadowy leftwing cabal unfortunately. Would be nice if it went the other way but alas

I'm funded by Soros' housemaid

According to my government I'm the lackey of Soros, getting paid to make our kids gay and bring migrants into the country. It honestly starts to sound like a good deal, especially when I look at the paycheck I get at CPS

My source of income is various MLM schemes in the former soviet bloc that have been running for so long no one remembers who I am, they just keep sending money.

I am funded by Antifa LLC and The Trans Agenda Corp.

Still haven't gotten my first check in the mail so when you figure out how to put in your information with them please tell me

I'm funded my Big Small that is trying to sell more less

Formerly funded by the biggest socialist organization in the USA. They owe me money (whenever the current pissing match ends) and i kinda need it.

Sorry, guess I'm scabbing on you all because nobody pays me, I just do it for the love of the game.

I did, long ago, dream of exiting the rat race so I could fulfill my dream of being a left-wing demagogue getting paid to spit fire in the faces of the powerful. Alas, I had no idea how to get started, then I read something by Nathan J. Robinson, the most prolific socdem essayist ever, where he said all his work gets him about $15K in profit a year, and I concluded that my dream would not come to pass. Man is at least 10x more prolific than I could be, writes less confrontational and therefore more accessible and publishable stuff, and is the editor and owner of a magazine. All for not enough to live on in any big city? Shit, the problem is that the left is the side of the people who don't have money. Only way to make a good living doing politics is to work for the right wing which I obviously couldn't so because while I may be a spineless cuttlefish, I still have a hard aragonite core that cannot bend and betray my principles.

I missed cabal sign up day so I’m waiting for Soros to give me my orders.

I'm selling patch space on a nascar style battle jacket.

A lefty grubby commie mom and pop global big box store. Its all very socialist.

I'm doing an unpaid internship as a peotestorbut it will give me the competitive edge to become a communist captain with a fully paid salary shortly. I expect to be sponsored by target when my time comes.

Bud Light

Still waiting on the job offer from the DPRK for all the free propaganda I’ve written for them.

Tell them I offered a whole $5 more. If that doesn't get management to scramble for a budget extension, nothing will.

The adrestian empire