this post was submitted on 01 Feb 2026
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] cepelinas@sopuli.xyz 1 points 4 hours ago

I wouldn't be surprised if this happaned to me, that's how bad my memory is.

[–] StarvingMartist@sh.itjust.works 2 points 6 hours ago

Just a reminder folks. this type of memory loss is very real, i have a much less intense version of it but its a way some people live their lives

I wonder where in that fantasy anon finishes the fap?

[–] Mac@mander.xyz 80 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (6 children)

How did gf go from gf to wife?

i forgot i had a gf

she tells me her husband is in the military

I dont think this story is real

[–] h3ll3rsh4nks@ani.social 7 points 20 hours ago

He forgot he got married duhhhhhh!

[–] ZoteTheMighty@lemmy.zip 6 points 20 hours ago

We don't tell fake stories on this community.

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 7 points 23 hours ago

He forgot he got married

[–] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 14 points 1 day ago

the whole story being something he remembered despite having no memory wasn't the giveaway?

[–] arrow74@lemmy.zip 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This all tracks for the military

[–] Mac@mander.xyz 3 points 13 hours ago

He's really just trying to remember which gf

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 21 points 1 day ago

Ain't no way

[–] WanderWisley@lemmy.world 24 points 1 day ago

Plot twist: anon didn’t actually join the military. He was just balls deep in a 8hr call of duty game and high on Mt dew and vape smoke.

[–] Broadfern@lemmy.world 84 points 1 day ago

Plot twist: wife knew it was her husband, has memory loss kink

[–] bridgeburner@lemmy.world 72 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Fake: Anon has a wife

Gay: Anon joined the military to look at naked dudes in the shower

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 26 points 1 day ago

Gay: Anon joined the military to look at naked dudes in the shower

Fake, anon forgot why he joined the military

[–] Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 6 points 1 day ago

Quiet, whiskey Jack

[–] Mycatiskai@lemmy.ca 15 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Who gets drafted into the army? Is this a Vietnam vet?

[–] rumschlumpel@feddit.org 15 points 1 day ago (2 children)

This might surprise you, but there are countries other than the US.

[–] Mycatiskai@lemmy.ca 1 points 2 hours ago

Memory loss - would get you kicked from military in any country with health care.

Grow my hair out and beard - maybe Korea, if they have a decade to grow facial hair.

Fuck like rabbits - kind of an Americanism

Go to the local pub - could be America or British (no draft in Britain, was called consctription)

Likely fiction anyways but many things made it likely USA.

[–] EdgeOfDistraction@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I don't just believe every crazy thing I read on the internet, you know.

[–] Sonotsugipaa@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 12 hours ago

I, for one, don't believe the crazy claim that there are countries other than the US

[–] shneancy@lemmy.world 1 points 22 hours ago

i believe at least koreans have mandatory military service

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Imagine how awesome that would be, assuming either A) she hasn't had sex with anyone else or B) if she did, you are okay with that

[–] alaphic@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Wait, I'm sorry, what part of either of these is awesome? I'm lost... If A is the case, whether she had sex with someone else or not is immaterial to the discussion. If she thinks OP is someone else, for all intents and purposes, he is, at least as far as our discussion goes, which makes her a cheater. If B is the case and OP indeed is okay with being cucked (whether it's by himself or not) I would argue that without both parties involved in the relationship having previously agreed to such an arrangement it is, once again, still infidelity and ergo decidedly not awesome.

Although, C) Ultimately none of this matters because D) OP wouldn't remember either way, regardless and E) none of this happened to begin with anyway, so... Shenanigans.

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

It's awesome because they chose each other all over again 💗

But also:

[–] NannerBanner@literature.cafe 5 points 1 day ago

I didn't realize you could get out of the army without your wife knowing. Maybe that's why it was gf at the beginning and suddenly switched at the end, so you don't realize the incongruity.