This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
The problem is that you talked to Bambieshart before encountering Lotherad's Hound. If you'd waited until after that fight, he would have given you Bambieshart's Shattered Urn, which you could give to Herrigold in the Dying Swamp for Kneivel's Sisters, the best weapon in the game
What nobody really talks about is that if you use the dogshit during the jabberwock fight exactly when it is bryllyg, it will apply the slithy status effect, which causes it to fail to gyre and gimble (you know the one), it rewards you with two lines of secret dialogue that completely recontextualizes the entire borogove arc.
If you're playing on build 75022[JA], the Jabberwock can only be found during real-life full moon days.
It really ties in with the lore of the Forsaken Scklorgh
"whaoa dude the lore is so sick dude like the wiki explains how bambieshart was actually an agent of the glimmer knights and was actually killed by an opposing faction dude if you go to the wall precisely after killing the ice queen boss you can drop down a ledge to where the wall would collapse him and seal it dude this lore is so epic"
The jangled skeletons guarding the entrance to Shart’s Hollow have a 1/100 chance of dropping a Putrid Shart Shard. If you combine 12 of them, you can craft a rare opposite-handed Bambieshart Brocade that, when dual wielded, gives a stacked 0.09% boost to critical hits. This strategy is crucial to my main build that is just the two brocades and a Grisly Thong, for aesthetic purposes.
Don't give up, Skeleton!
And somehow there is a 1.5 hour lore video by VaatiVidya about this character and it has 7.5M views.
A paragraph and a half in, and my brain urinated on itself. I saw words, but few of them made sense. Not to say the greentext wasn't good. I'm just an old Gen X, unfamiliar with the way the kids talk these days.
It's about a Nintendo called Elden Ring.
Ohh is that on the Microsoft Nintendo or the Sony Nintendo?
I believe it's the one that you plug in the telly
Are you some kind of tech-whizz?
I am, thanks for noticing ! Even have the little pointy hat and all
How would I know? My grandkids play on that damn thing!
It's about how some video games do this thing where the lore is barely explained in cryptic sentences by the few characters, and basically you need an online wiki to understand anything about the story of the game.
The games most gilty of this are the fark souls franchise. Good games, but I hate this kind of lore.
Same but Gen Y
Anon got filtered by the Tree Guardian and is coping
Dies, you pick up their items, it's dogshit
This part is true tho
No! My consecrated shmungous! I'll have to wait until New Game+ to get those again (he only gives you two, according to the wiki)
Jabberwocky reference tho