"Wow, that's an ugly wound from the government's death ray."
"Yeah, I feel really bad about not getting out of the way. I think I've learned my lesson for next time."
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"Wow, that's an ugly wound from the government's death ray."
"Yeah, I feel really bad about not getting out of the way. I think I've learned my lesson for next time."
If we work together comrades, maybe we can get the government's new death ray to destroy the Orphan Crushing Machine that has been causing issues.
My only grip is that it should be a private company death ray. The government just decides who the death ray is allowed to zap
"In a 531-4 historic vote the government is limiting the death ray to not target citizens on their own private property. This does not extend to illegals or private property that isn't owned by the citizen. For more on this we found a guy worth 4 million and asked his opinion on the matter"
An incomprehensible idiot: "I HATE YOOOOOOUUUUU! I HAAAAAATE YOOOOOUU"
and now here is Thompson with the weather
My only grip is that it should be a private company death ray.
Nothing particularly private about ICE. Nevermind the bloated municipal police forces or the $1.5T military. The current Trump government has been more interested in nationalizing companies or integrating them into government administrations than any government in living memory. Intel is a state owned enterprise. Palantir might as well be a department of the NSA. SpaceX is a subsidiary of NASA and the Pentagon. Amazon's out there producing movies for the First Lady just to stay in Donald's good graces.
We've privatized the profits, but the chief executive's minions are firmly in control of the policies.
"I don't really mind pedophiles in the oval office because they haven't rape my children" is partially true. My take on maga is that they tolerate whatever rich people do because deep down, they know they would do the same things if they had the opportunity. That's the point they reached.
You know which of your colleagues are pedophile? People talking about this or how?
About sums up the conservative movement in a nutshell.... that and, if you'd just run faster the death ray wouldn't hit you.
I support the death ray. It's needed to keep us safe from the bad people. I am disappointed that it killed my wife and kids, but I'd definitely vote for the death ray again.
It works for bear attacks, so...
I would still mind the government's death ray even if it were guaranteed to not affect me because I'm not a sociopath.
So you're not a Republican then,
this is definitely one of the core American values
Being American is all about hurting the right people.
Did you mean to say brown or poor?
Then when it hits someone they know, they get upset that the government in using the death ray on the wrong people.
Never crosses their mind that maybe the government shouldn't be using a death ray at all.

Upvote for the effort involved. That's dedication, i must say.
There has to be a body of oversight. This current one just isn't good
"They're not hurting the right people"
He's at least running, actual analogy would be people laying on their back sipping whatever they drink and say "it's not bad, it hasn't hit me at all"
deathray
death ray
Nono, it wasn't a typo...

I love the cartonist, Im gonna call him Jon Badams
Remember how the other party was gonna fire the death ray. They never did, but the guy firing it now said that they would. I'm glad I didn't vote for them. Who knows how bad it would have been if they fired the death ray.
I would've settled for them firing it at someone else. Then we can start organizing!
I really wish more people cared about the tens of millions of people sentenced to starve to death by the US government cutting USAID.
MAGA & Tankies = Happy USAID got obliterated.
I just had a "Christian" defend doing that with a string of Bible verses. Not even kidding. According to them, "charity shouldn't be mandatory" and it's in the Bible and this means killing millions of people and creating suffering in millions of others.
Not the US, but I have an acquaintance who is a "Christian". She's an immigrant. She goes to church with mostly nonwhite immigrants. She's extremely racist, among other things. You can't make that shit up π€·π»
These kind are experts at twisting the verse to ignore the values.
To be fair the values are ambiguous and not at all coherent or consistent page to page, and interpretations have managed to somehow adapt to the mindset of the ruling class for over 1500 years.
yeah, absolutely. I think we should deport all the immigrants.
wait, not me!
...bc you are from an indigenous people group, r-r-right?
I am, actually!
bam, deported to Africa π, guud luck with your new life
nothing bad can happen, it can only guud happen
Murica! Woo! Fuck yeah! Freeeeeeeeeeeedom!*
spoiler
*conditions apply
First the death ray came for the Communists And I did not speak out Because I was not a Communist...
One of the most precise memes yet.
I don't mind that communism has starved people because it hasn't starved me yet.