I'm not a historian, but I wouldn't be surprised if marriage existed before governments
this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2026
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Government, church same difference (unfortunately very true in more countries than I'd hope 🤢).
Pretty sure marriage predates organized religion.
Is that a feeling or are you thinking of something specifically?
Probably dates back to the dawn of agriculture.
No need for contracts until the invention of property.
Check Wikipedia “History of marriage”
Marriage is just making a promise to another person in the presence of witnesses. The government part just ensures certain rights and protections, particularly involving health and money.
I have no idea why religion would need to be involved. It's not involved in mine.
Governments predate churches
Christian churches sure but if we're talking goverments vs organised religion not sure ...
It all depends on the exact definitions to be used. Is a village chieftain a government? Can a 50 person cult be considered organized religion? It's pretty much impossible to be sure, since those things probably predate written records and marriage has definitely existed since before writing. In either case it's pretty silly to blame modern governments or religions for the existence of marriage.
Modern marriage isn't much more than a financial arrangement. Not tryna say people don’t get married for love, but the fact remains that as an institution, marriage isn’t about love and never has been.
Literally just got married this weekend. It was for love. Because now, it's in the public records that I love this woman, and she loves me.
It was cheaper (for us) than taking a press release.
Congrats! May you have joy together, forever and ever
Thank you! I believe we will.
This probably depends on the country, but being married can make some official processes simpler. For example, if a married person dies there are certain things that just default to their official spouse unless otherwise specified in a legal will.
This kinda makes your point about it being a financial arrangement, with a bit of a legal one in there too I guess.
I also think it sometimes makes things easier where kids are involved during official processes.
Also your spouse gets privileges and powers as you're dying. The reason gay marriage is legal in America stems from someone being refused those rights. It was a major problem during AIDS too.
Marriage as a legal status originated in religion. Governments are merely adapting what the church has been enforcing for centuries.
You're thinking of modern marriage and legal status. Marriage existed thousands of years ago separately from religion. It was about inheritance.
It began as a way to "secure" having your own babies. "I take care of all your needs and in exchange you only fuck with me so all your children are mine". That's why cheating wasn't seen as a problem for men but it was for married women.
As male cheating became seen as problematic, though, marriage topics suddenly became pushed more by women rather than men.
Well that makes sense in their interest too? If I follow that weird logic, women can then monopolize the resources that the man brings?
Yes, lets all blame the one guy you’re thinking of that subjected the entire prehistoric population of earth to their concept of marriage. You’re a genius.
Marriage historically didn't involve the government becaue it wss a pre-government invention, it's just that states grow out of organised religion (and the prevailing archeological theory is that's quite literally why humans urbanised in the first place, because of organised religion.)
It's how they urbanised, not why. The why is agriculture. And it wasn't religion the way we see it today.
It’s how they urbanised, not why.
Maybe. That's definitely what I would have assumed, but it seems like the ingredients for creating permanent settlement really stemmed from specific religious practices - periodic visits to the same site to sacrifice or engage in a ritual, flooding of areas to venerate the water god(/s) - but maybe the veneration of water deities in that was a ruse to allow land-management to happen because the priest class didn't trust non-priests to carry out their projects without a religious story behind it.
And it wasn’t religion the way we see it today.
No, i would say it's very similar. Pilgrimages, a priest class, specific buildings to worship in and "sunday school" of some form or another. If you disapprove of modern religions but like the old ones then it's really the content of the religion you have irks with.
No, i would say it's very similar. Pilgrimages, a priest class, specific buildings to worship in and "sunday school" of some form or another. If you disapprove of modern religions but like the old ones then it's really the content of the religion you have irks with.
Early "shrines" in Mesopotamia were about making a landmark to find and return to and rebuild each time they came by (which isn't necessarily a "pilgrimage", just knowing where to return), and then building large storage rooms for all the grain that could be redistributed to the people. We don't have any particular trace related to sacrifice or teaching worship, or even any mark of distinction between priest and non-priest class, as this was before writing. Source is "the invention of the city" by Gwendolyn Leick.
It was religion. Religion wanted to control sex. Think of the power this gives them. When you can have sex, with who you can have sex, how you have sex... They decided they wanted to control your life through sex (and social life too).
This is the reason why they were/are all so anti gay. Get people having sex all the time, they can't have that! Also abortion. People having sex out of wedlock and not getting "punished" with an unwanted child? Sooo scary for them. Masturbation and pornography also, same thing. They want to get all up in your business. They want to control sex and it's the power that gives them.
Marriage is the church's way of giving you permission to have sex.
The obsession with sex is a thing from the abrahamic religions, but marriage is much older than any of them.