this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2026
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But you are not, this is what you wished for.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )
Psychic damage, I'll take it
Man, if I rolled a 1 attempting to push someone off a cliff my DM would absolutely have me miss and stumble off the cliff.
For a moment I was impressed at the stitchery but then I realized it wasn't real.
Is it not? Damn I wanted to praise the font and keming.
I like the font and kerning too.
But each individual letter is so exactly the same throughout, it is an "embroidery" font, not hand embroidery.
Hard to tell for sure bc the picture quality isn't great, but for example all the e's look pretty different, and the 2 g's look extremely different.
Check the o s, how they are all a little thicker than most of the letters, even though it's a simple letter. I hope I am wrong and they just have an unusual style and a very consistent hand.
I initially thought this was a cat-related meme for some reason
This is why critical fails are usually so much better than critical successes. Lean into that shit hard!
"P...please stop caressing me. I'm trying to kill you!"
"Oh, you don't like that? You don't like mommy's strong hands rubbing your orc back? You don't want this little barbarian dwarf melting all the stress of battle away from you? Go ahead and tell me you don't really want it, bitch!"
And that's how we got an orc pet to follow the party around!
you've gone in too deep. it would be awkward to stop now.
If that happened at my table, I would be as uncomfortable as the orc is.
Rolls 20: "but instead you lightly caress his back, and he likes it"?
I LOLd during a meeting because of this.