this post was submitted on 29 Feb 2024
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Scientists confirm sighting of two same-sex marine giants copulating in amorous encounter off Hawaii coast

top 34 comments
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[–] tsonfeir@lemm.ee 95 points 8 months ago (3 children)

HoMoSeXuAlItY doEsNt eXiSt iN NaAaATtuUuUurRrRrEEeEeeeeee

[–] RedditWanderer@lemmy.world 41 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

It's Joe, he's making the fucking whales gay, with the frogs.

[–] tsonfeir@lemm.ee 9 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Joe Rogan or Joe Arpaio? 😇

[–] bitwaba@lemmy.world 12 points 8 months ago

Joe Stevens

He's my neighbor and acts like he's got a 9-5, but I know he spends his off time in the basement with the light on thinking up new ways to enforce the global liberal agenda. Probably has posters of gay whales hung up in his office.

[–] bingbong@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago

Joe Blowhole.

[–] csolisr@hub.azkware.net 1 points 8 months ago

Heckssake the atrazine already contaminated the plankton en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atrazine…

What if they said "No homo" before having sex?

[–] logicbomb@lemmy.world 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

It must be the windmills turning them gay.

[–] tsonfeir@lemm.ee 2 points 8 months ago

It’s the WECs (wave energy converters)

[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 72 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

So. They’re…Brokeback Whales…?

[–] tal@lemmy.today 50 points 8 months ago (1 children)

During the intimate encounter photographed in Hawaii, one of the whales was seen to be holding the other in place with its pectoral fins while penetrating it. The whale underneath appeared to be ailing, being noticeably emaciated and covered in whale lice, white-colored parasites sometimes found on cetaceans.

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2022-10-12/whale-lice-captured-on-hervey-bay-humpback/101518622

University of Sunshine Coast ecologist Alexis Levengood says the only way a whale becomes infested with lice is through body contact with another whale.

"They usually get them through mating or from aggression and if they're fighting.

Might regret that.

[–] bitwaba@lemmy.world 30 points 8 months ago

That asshole gave me crabs!

[–] GroundedGator@lemmy.world 48 points 8 months ago (1 children)

They must like fish sticks.

[–] mindlight@lemm.ee 47 points 8 months ago (2 children)

Oh. The republicans will soon present a bill for the conversion therapy of whales....

[–] sleepyTonia@programming.dev 26 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Or now they'll admit climate change is a thing. While claiming it's making whales gay.

[–] Spacehooks@reddthat.com 2 points 8 months ago

If that's what it takes to convince them...

[–] flipht@kbin.social 0 points 8 months ago

They do that with humans because it's harder to just get away with killing us.

For whales? They'll just try to revive the whaling industry.

[–] ghostdoggtv@lemmy.world 36 points 8 months ago (1 children)

They're turning the frickin whales gay now

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 20 points 8 months ago

That's why they're called humpbacks. They like to hump and they'll come back for more.

[–] gedaliyah@lemmy.world 20 points 8 months ago

Stop forcing your lifestyle on me! /s

[–] b3an@lemmy.world 18 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Gay whales. Gayles? Ghayles? Ghales?

[–] Klear@lemmy.world 5 points 8 months ago
[–] SeaJ@lemm.ee 14 points 8 months ago

Are these whales unaware that homosexuality is unnatural? /s

[–] negativeyoda@lemmy.world 13 points 8 months ago

More like brokebacks

[–] gregorum@lemm.ee 12 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

lol, amazing.

[–] moistclump@lemmy.world 10 points 8 months ago (1 children)

And inspiration to gay humpers everywhere.

[–] JimVanDeventer@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago

My humps, my humps, my humps, my humps, my humps…

[–] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 7 points 8 months ago

Save you a click: it was butt sex and the bottom is sickly.

[–] PetteriSkaffari@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Why would they assume the whales were having sex for the first time?

[–] Rakonat@lemmy.world 4 points 8 months ago

First time the vouyer got it on film.

[–] flango@lemmy.eco.br 2 points 8 months ago

Best part:

Humpback whales are hefty lovers, measuring up to 16 meters (or 52ft) in length and weighing as much as 36 tons, which is the weight of several buses.