Ask Lemmy
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So much is contexts dependent.
If it is obvious that you are asking because someone is different, it can feel icky regardless of the asker's intentions. For example, if the one brown person at the front desk always gets asked this by customers, but no one seems to ask their coworkers. No follow up questions necessary, just the fact of being singled out feels bad.
I think it is less about being from North America and more about being in the ingroup or outgroup depending on ancestry.
Compare this to the context of travelers hanging out at a youth hostel. Everyone is curious about where everyone else is from and it is fun to talk about it.