I think when you think all sorts of everyday experiences can "turn you gay", you might possibly be gay? And what do the scanners do to gay people? Turn them straight, or somehow more gay?

Like, I've tried all sorts of things in my life, including same-sex sex, and am still straight - like even if I were actively trying to change my sexuality it doesn't. Sometimes to my despair, as I get older, it would be easier to not have such a strong preference.

He's using that as an excuse to have gay sex on when he travels. When you get scanned on the way home it turns you back straight. Or makes you gay^2 more research needs to be done.

He doesn't want to go into the gay machine so he prefers to get patted down by other men.

Can confirm. I was super straight until I locked eyes with that tall dark and handsome TSA agent on the other side of the machine. Sounds like this dude has a similar story.

Yea! Always opt out of the scanner and get groped by a male TSA agent instead. That's definitely the less gay option!

It turned him gay after one scan! That is why, when his wife called the hotel room, a random guy answered the phone. He explained to her that her husband is now gay because of the airport scanner and he would be turned back once he scanned again. "They work like switches, he said to her, and then added, "and boy was your husband turned on!” He went in to explain it always makes her husband gay when travels.

We need to encourage this belief that way we can keep those plague rats contained

...he sucked dick at airport toilet, didn't he?

For the love of God why is the right so fucking obsessed with people's sexuality? Leave people the fuck alone...

Wait, since the homophobes are in power, can we use this?

Turns out defunding science turns you gay, guys..

Somehow this comic accurately describes our reality:

Finally a conspiracy theory that's fun. Unfortunately, I keep going through the airport body scanners, but for some reason I'm not feeling gay

To be fair, every time he goes through one he has gay sex in the airport washroom. I mean, it is EVERY time for him. Quite the correlation for quite a lot of cum in his mouth.

... and adds, "so if anyone catches me sucking dick in the airport bathroom, that would be why."

"Refuse airport bodyscan searches!"

"Because they're a means of privacy invasion and demostrates the TSA's pointless existence yet dangerous power?"

"No, becuase they'll turn you into a sausage-loving twink!"

In case anyone is wondering why they say stupid shit like this, it's because they need to be able to convince a whole lot of stupid people that being gay can be "cured", just as it can be caused. And the cure? Religion.

It's all a big scam.

As stupid as this is, I see mostly positive consequences coming from this: either they'll oppose TSA, or they'll refuse to fly. Both sound like a win to me.

seems like they are running out of funny things to say

It happened to him & he felt the need to warn everyone. 🤣🤣🤣

Stop it! Stop giving stupid people attention. Seriosly. They feed their stupidity with attention. Just ignore, dont't share and they will dissapear.

Then why was I gay before I ever flew? Seriously when I was young and my peers were getting crushes on girls, I was getting crushes on boys. Seems I always liked boys and was never interested in girls.

Hmmm... Every gay person I know has drank water. He should probably stop drinking water just to be safe.

They do? Great! Let's get rid of them.

I think he NEEDS that to be the case.

Dude, you were gay already and just hadn't admitted it to yourself.

It’s pretty telling when you make up fantasies about things that become part of your core beliefs because you think about them that much.

Just sayin. It’s pretty obvious.

Maybe they just got the full scope-and-grope experience and decided they liked it.

Christianity is the silliest of all the religions.

And that’s saying something.

There are some really silly ones

Yet Christianity is the silliest.

Sexy ass blonde man in a loin cloth showing off his shredded abs… plastering this image everywhere.

Worshiping this sexy man.

And then being like “gay is bad mkay”

Silly.

So he’s been doing a lot of flying huh?

I do feel a little more flamboyant every time I take a flight.

So now that the airport scanner made you gay, what are you going to do with your new gayness?