this post was submitted on 20 Nov 2023
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Although I have accomplished quite a bit in my short lifetime, I’m going through a stage where I feel like a loser.

I’ve been slacking off and honestly kind of board with my business. It’s at the point where I can get by without doing much work.

Everytime I come back to my hometown my family just doesn’t get it. They don’t understand my entrepreneurial mindset.

I’m 21 years old and I’ve built an online fitness coaching business.

I’ve generated multiple six figures over the last 2-3 years.

I decided I was finished with college after my freshman year and wanted to pursue my business all the way.

I moved to San Diego and I’ve been there for about two years.

Although most people would say you’re doing amazing and killing it.

I know I could be doing better.

I want a bigger opportunity, I want to work harder, and develop a vision so huge it scares me.

I feel like my next evolution is coming up but right now I’m in the growing pains where I feel a little lost and unsure of what’s next.

I have a few ideas and I’m testing out the market for them but it’s an uncomfortable period.

I feel like I’m just coasting and not growing. It’s not a fun place to be.

Any advice?

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[–] Seedpound@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Ride the wave of uncertainty - keep your eyes open

[–] zebbiiee@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You’re not alone buddy. Plateaus come and go. Give yourself some grace and take the “down time” to get curious. Peek into things that aren’t biz related and others that are outside of your niche. Some of the most successful entrepreneurs and businesses marry two unlikely value sets to create something truly special. Take heart.

[–] Doors_N_Corners@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

This part of entrepreneurship could use coaching. You should hire a life coach or therapist or honestly both. I slipped into real toxic depression and alcohol, drugs etc when I got to my most successful part. Partially at least because I lost the thing that made me feel accomplished and gave me something to do. I did too well at automation and hiring sop etc and made myself obsolete. You need some guidance on how to aim toward your next project. Entrepreneurs unfortunately need to be self starters

[–] Spruceivory@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

We all feel less of ourselves at one point or another. Our best recourse is to brush it off, stand back up, make do with what we do best. Get back to work. Hard work is never dismissed and always pays off in the long run.

[–] brianl047@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Cool (the business I mean)

No advice but hope you reach your future goals

[–] Wallz747@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I mined 300+ Bitcoin in 2013 and spent most on party favors... but... 2017 cane along and I mined several thousand ETH. Learn from your mistakes and be patient, you can make opportunity you have to wait for the right moment and grab it.

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[–] Drdank-42@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

It's all good, brother. I'm 47 and ha e worked for myself since 1994 and have been rich and just got by sometimes. You've got a hustlers mindset, and that's not a bad thing. My mom passed away 3 years ago tomorrow, and she made me realize that she was proud of me no matter what I did. As long as I put my all into it, she was proud. Live for yourself on your terms. Your family will eventually realize you can take care of yourself, and that will change. As far as what you do. Don't worry about how much you make. Do something that makes you happy and eventually make it into a career. I still consider myself a hustler because I can make money in different ways. As an artist, writer, business owner, and more. Try being happy and then when the money comes. It will be that much more rewarding! Good luck 👍

[–] randomburnerish@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Not a business issue, a mental health issue. How’s your lifestyle? Eat/sleep/exercise well? Good nutrition? Underlying anxiety/depression?

[–] SoftwareTree18@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Maybe get a break and go back to school? You can give MBA a shot ig

[–] CharlieandLola717@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I totally get it. I'm in mid to late 20s and going for 100k next year, just got fucked over and feel a bit low. If you ever want to chat or exchange business ideas I'd be down to chat.

[–] wellthatwasashock@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Oooooph. I feel this. Almost the exact same thing going on here. Stay safe man.

[–] WellsAccountancy@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I genuinely believe none of the commentators have read the body of your post, just the title...otherwise they'd be telling you that multiple 6 figures by the age of 21 is not a failure by any metric!!!

You're doing more than fine. The only potential "problem" that you've identified is the risk of complacency, which can be addressed by venturing into a new vertical or a guided approach to improving user experience within the one you're currently in.

I actually have a gym owner client with 2 locations in the US with a newly added and growing online consultancy that I can share anonymized notes/feedback on (for ethical and security considerations, I don't share details that could identify my client(s))

And your family won't understand your entrepreneurial mindset, because most people don't. If they did then they, along with most of the world, would compete away your profit margins.

As someone that was a former foster kid and has achieved many blessings in business, almost no one from my childhood believes or understands my milestones or challenges as an entrepreneur and I quickly realized that I needed to fraternize with other entrepreneurs; people that share my experiences and aspirations.

Feel free to reach out to me @ (310) 844-6683 if you wanna chat or text.

[–] purpletowel26@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago
[–] JAnwyl@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

You need to accept there is always someone ahead of you and stay off of social media where there are posts showing millions of (fitness)influencers that seem to be kicking ass. Also have some humility, millions have medical issues preventing them from performing close to the level you perform at. Do some volunteering and notice those with real challenges trying to make it day to day.

[–] bj1231@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Consider being a serial entrepreneur. Get your first business to where it will run itself and either step back from it or sell it and start another business. Once you get the second one going you can come back to the first one, fresh again, and move it to the next level

[–] DimensionCharming808@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Enroll in University seems like the best answer.

[–] Traditional_Mix68@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Why does everyone always hate on going to college? I’m very much considering going or just taking some classes while running my business because I feel like I could learn a lot and make a lot of connections

[–] ilovelilacs@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

I'd like to stay a lifelong learner (with degrees to show for it too but money is tight most of the time). However, thankfully there are now lots of free resources online to further one's education. Coursera.org comes to mind often. :D

[–] Human_Ad_7045@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Enjoy your your current coasting it doesn't happen often enough.

If you've reached a coasting period it means your not burnt out and have the capacity to think logically.

As for the money part, if you have what you need, have what you want and are working on retirement savings, the compelling questions become, how much do you want, how much do you need & what the hell are you going to do with it.

The guy with the most money wins nothing and you can't take it with you. Finally, make sure find some time to enjoy life, have fun and laugh. This comes to you from a guy who had a significant heart attack at 52 and a 2nd one 9 months later. I happily retired at 58 after shutting down my own company when I declared "I'm done, Fvck everything!" 🙂

[–] pnguyenwinning@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

There is no end to the hustlersnlife

[–] thoughtful_thots@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Why do you think you're slacking off? Is it that you're afraid to try to achieve your big dreams or is it that you're losing interest, or something else?

Do you have a clear vision for what you want, and you just need to get started, or would you benefit from unplugging and taking a mini sabbatical to take space to figure out what's next?

Sometimes we need to jump in, sometimes we need to take a step back.

[–] knoxxell@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

I’m in the same place man (although I’m in music and not anywhere close to that financially) relatively speaking I’m much more successful than most in my field especially for my age. I have a lot of skills and experience but none of the paths I’m currently on excite me. It’s taken me two years to really figure out that I need to step away and buckle down when it comes to personal health and expression.

For me that looks like getting a sustainable part time job outside of music to fill my time and let me explore my own creativity without having to rely on opportunities I’m unsure of.

For you it will look different but focusing on health and wellness will never be a bad choice.

[–] pensivemindtime@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Honestly wish I had the talent, intellect, drive, discipline you have to be in such a position. Bored of your multi-thousand dollar business.

Are you interested or opposed to helping other less successful people reach such heights?

Hell, one day I want to be in your position and I’m about a decade older than you.

[–] bersonio@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

A loser is someone who doesn't do anything. You have an entrepreneurial mindset. You take risks and strive to build something new. You may face setbacks and experience both gains and losses. Never lose yourself and your dreams. It doesn't matter if you're rich or poor at the moment. What matters is your skill, experience, and mindset. There will never be ideal times, we must develop in the conditions that exist. Keep moving forward, even when things are tough, your efforts will be rewarded.🚀

[–] behrific@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Start another business, but don’t put everything into it. Failing can bring us back to reality and take some of the startup bug away, or it can prove we are the next Edison and need to create more.

[–] Swimming_Science7271@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Well to me your set up sounds like dream. To be that young and fully financially free is a major blessing. I'm in my late twenties and still building and haven't caught my break/stride yet. And let me assure you every day is pain when you're financially strapped.

But what I will say is that boredom is peace. So enjoy your peace while it lasts. Because as you continue to live and evolve, so do your problems. And things can change for better or worst overnight and in unexpected ways.

Also growth and productivity don't always have to be about money. Invest in your personal growth while you have the "downtime." Become a better you. Get in great shape. See the world. Expand your experiences and the next opportunity will present itself with time.

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[–] desert_dweller27@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (10 children)

It sounds like you're anticipating happiness to come from external factors. Just so you know, it never will. It's only inside yourself that you'll find it. Then once you do, everything external becomes play - your business, the risks you take, the challenges you face. You become so stable internally, that no matter what storm is raging outside, inside you're at ease.

Check out some books by Thich Nhat Hanh.

You're already doing great. Good luck.

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[–] olongjohnson111@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Judt put yourself a fe years back where and how you were then.

There is no stop on what you want and could be.

As long as you dont fall back do whatever you want.

Dont do drugs.

Dont get married yet, or kids.

If you hit the million and the age of 30 do whatever the fu you want. If you got the million and dont want more

[–] fanomvibes@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Dude failure is endless. Most people fail until they hit 50 years old. You’ll be alright. Don’t beat yourself over it too much. As you get older you’ll get tired of making emotional decisions (just like me) and you’ll inevitably start winning. When you get older life becomes boring. You get lonely, and literally the only place left to go is up. This is why older people are more successful than young people. You are lucky to still have your parents care about you, but when you hit 28, that’s when you realize nobody is coming to save you then you’ll start succeeding in ways that you never thought was possible when you were younger. The emotions will disappear and all you’ll be left with is a latter that will take you to the top.

This is really solid advice. Thank you for this

[–] DrInsanoWins@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Growth, certainty and uncertainty are all required for happiness. You’re about to be happier

I appreciate this. Thank you brother

[–] droppingscience311@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

First of all, congrats on building a successful business! There are some whom due to outside factors and other issues, never ever get it, so way to go!

Second, even though there is a clock on our lives from birth, it’s ok to allow for time to ponder and gain perspective. You are very young and fortunately you have time on your side, which won’t always be the case.

Remember, not all growth is linear nor measured by constant income increases (despite how it appears). You can be growing in ways that will be utilized and come into play without you being aware of them, and only after living through them and in hindsight will they be realized.

You’ve mentioned you’re trying different things, sounds like you’re still applying yourself. You’re growing, be cognizant and stay vigilant. Your family (if not entrepreneurial) might not ever understand.

Stay up.

Thank you for this in depth response brother… it’s much appreciated

[–] WecanWewilldoit_@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

You should be proud of yourself for achieving so much . You have no idea how many people would want that . Honestly , its a low phase but you will get past that . Don't let it affect you or get it to your brain . Keep hustling , you are growing even while trying out , testing , understanding what works and what doesn't ,its part of the process (Ik easier said than done but can't lose hope ) . All the best to you , if you have achieved so much so far then there is no stopping !

[–] blockchainbub@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

The real painful truth is you’re comparing yourself to the $300k - $600k average salaries we are seen in tech and other industries. Post covid has changed the benefits of being an entrepreneur compared to 9 to 5 since in both scenarios you can work from home (and many other things I cbf to type)

[–] DemonGoddes@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Get a retail job at minimum wage, the hate you have for that should fuel you and make you motivated. Forced yourself to stick our the job a month or so,it's no good going in knowing you can quit anytime. That or break your heart, those are 2 of the things that motivate me super hard when I plateau.

[–] fr0zen32@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Honestly, you don't have to love your business to profit from it. If I were you, I'd think about how to go about scaling it so that you can focus on other ventures or even find something more interesting to do with your current one. Most people work 80% of their time in the business and 20% on the business. If you automate that machine, you can spend 80% on the business and 20% in the business. That to me has been the fun part, at least for my business, rather than the business itself.

[–] ilovelilacs@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

You can maybe do mentorship to other new entrepreneurs starting out. Helping others might just give you motivation to move past your own hurdles.

[–] Bon_Visions@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

I don't know how to give advice.

Being young still holds so many possibilities.

Recently, I made a decision that no one in my family supported, but I still persisted.
I don't know whether the outcome will be good or bad, but I want to give it a try.

[–] meerabeingaware@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Yes the advice is to work on how to think...

If you change that you will change how you feel and that has a direct impact on being productive and thinking with clarity.

I am a Mind coach and you can reach out on meera@aware-living.com

Remember you are what you choose to think about yourself.

Love & light to you always 🌻

[–] Software-Innovator@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

 "I have accomplished quite a bit in my short lifetime"... that itself means you know you have achieved a lot in a short span. You are just 21, don't be hard on yourself, slow down when needed and anticipate what should be your next step. Nothing is achieved if you expectation is too high, you will get there undoubtedly.

[–] Omzzz@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

I would love your problems lol

There was a song that I really liked and used to listen to ot all the time "love yours", it says that no such thing as a life better than yours, always gonna be a "bigger house", "bigger car" but when you appreciate what you have that's how you will be happy. And you know what maybe there is someone that wants the life that you have.

[–] Nearby-Buffalo-6829@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Feeling stuck after early success is normal. It's a sign you're ready for a bigger challenge. Reconnect with your initial motivations and set larger, scarier goals. Embrace this uncomfortable period as a growth opportunity. Keep experimenting with new ideas and seek inspiration from others in your field. Real progress takes time and patience. Connect with like-minded entrepreneurs for support. You've already achieved a lot, and this feeling of being lost often comes right before a major breakthrough. Stay focused and keep pushing forward. You've got this! I found a cool article for you https://www.cuppa.so/post/breaking-entrepreneurial-burnout-understanding-signs-and-recovery-strategies

[–] lifom72@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Time to build an app! Instead of 1:1 fitness… scale your business and do 1: many! Let your fitness programs work for you. Find your niche and grow that audience.

[–] SaleLore@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Energy and work ebbs and flows. You are human. Even the greats failed.

[–] FondantSlow1023@alien.top 1 points 1 year ago

Work on your internal motivation and life philosophy. It sounds as if what is driving you is you want to be a big deal so you can prove to the world you're officially 'not a loser'. You don't have to prove anything to anyone. What life do you really want deep down. make sure you're chasing the right goal for the right reasons. At the end of the day nobody really cares if you're 'killing it' or not

You cannot succeed without pain. Your first business went through with the pain of inability to suit in your own family, also college dropout ( I’m from Europe, we don’t get into loans when it comes to college so that probably was no picnic either) now the world, gods, planet. Call it whatever you want, is testing if you are a good fit for it.

You always can hire some help, people, find someone to pull this ideas off, but most important is if you are ready for the next step.

That’s funny, but I’ve learned that some time ago. If I wouldn’t have been broke after few businesses that went bankrupt I would totally fuck it up my current business.

Life is a process, trust and be open getting better context in life 😎

Connect with like minded people like you in San Diego. Groups that will help push you and keep you accountable to reach your potential. Entrepreneurial Masterminds. Live in an entrepreneur house. Hire a executive coach. Check out Junto Global (Parker Harris), Luke Depron, EO San Diego (entrepreneur organization). Michael McCafferty is a coach. DM me if any questions.

https://instagram.com/fitmenproject?igshid=MmVlMjlkMTBhMg==

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