The moths. Most likely not to eat me.
this post was submitted on 06 Dec 2025
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Moths. AKA goth butterflies.
Not only that, the only thing that makes them spooky and startling is that they randomly fly around like a dumbass towards anything light related.
When they're just sitting still being chill they're actually quite adorable.
You mean glam butterflies
Actually butterflies are moths
Moths!
Or maybe bees. I have always wanted to hug a bumblebee.
At a table by myself, with everyone making fun of my laughably low number of legs
I'm staying out. At that size, many of those are just terrifying, even if they are cool when much smaller than me.
Bees 100%
No kidding, bunch of weirdos around here
Now it's just me, and the bees
At one of the tables without giant bugs occupying all the seats
...Right next to the oil furnace in the basement, trying to figure out how to rig it to blow and burn the place down.
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(3 replies)
Moths every time. It's not even close.
Bees because bees are usually pretty chill and I like chill. Especially the bumblebees.
I have a decent relationship with mantids already. I'd sit with them.
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Tangent, there is a fun fantasy book series by Adrian Tchaikovsky where all the main characters are humanoids with bug qualities. So basically spiderman, antman, mantisman, etc. It is entertaining when you mix fantasy tropes (dueling for honour!) with mantis arm spikes...
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At one of those empty tables
Everyone knows that anyone who knows anything about anything would go for the most evolutionary diverse group - spiders.
There is nothing these little guys can't do. Fly over hundreds of kilometres? You got it. Extend their nervous systems several thousand times past their body area using web? Check. Biological hydraulic system? Yup. Jump 10 to 50 times their body lenght? No problem. Live underwater using silk made diving suit? You bet your sweet behind. Paralyze your body after one bite? Easy.
None of this makes me want to share a table with them.
I wouldnโt dare to sit here as a human. Iโm too big and would probably squish them all by accident.
But if I got to choose to be one, Iโd go for the spiders. You get:
- two extra legs over the rest
- your own supply of crafting materials
- lots of eyes
- and a cozy place to relax in
Mantises. I love those things. We like to find them in the garden and sometimes pick them up and let them crawl all over us.
As a person from a sensible country without praying mantis running freely around outside in nature, this has very much changed my opinion on them!
Truly they're not scary in person. They're very gentle when they crawl on you. They're very good at camouflaging in bushes, so it's a fun activity to look for them.
Bees. So long as I stay on their good side they're chill and they'll protect me from the other options that want to eat me.
I would definitely want to be friends with the mantises in case they go postal one day
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Idk, I feel like the colourful ones would group a bit differently.
The popular high-fashion ones (orchid mantis, jumping spider, rosy maple moth) would be at one table, goths (bumblebee, tarantula) at the other, jocks are already together (beetles, tho ladybug prob carries a knife), goodly two-shoes nerds (bees) also, other spiders are obv commuter nerds, ...
Anyway, I would skip lunch bcs this feels like a way too social situation.
Mantises. Fuck aphids
I will sit under the lightbulb and wait for the moths to join me.
The moths table for the vibes, but the seat closest to the spiders to get in on their jokes.
i think Id make a pretty moth :)
Outside, against the wall, alone. At least that's where I sat in high school. So, maybe with the wasps?
On the floor
Unless you are a piece of shit, because then the beetles will ragdoll roll you around until you are a nice sphere of shit.
(How do I plan such a funeral for myself?)
I think I'd go with the moths. Least likely to kill me.
Spider gang, no doubt
Arachnophilic freak
LรMP!
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